It was a hot summer Ohio evening on July 13, 1988 –Surrounded by family, friends and other ordained elders from the district, General Superintendent Jerald Johnson placed his hands on my head and ordained me as an elder in the church of the Nazarene.  Later my wife, Linda shared with me that during Dr. Johnson’s prayer she felt our first born son, Christopher, move in her womb for the first time.  

Among Dr. Johnson’s instructions this one really stood out.  “Do the work of an evangelist”.  I thought I understand.  Make sure you give an alter call at the end of a sermon.  Learn the Romans road and the four spiritual laws.  Join evangelistic rallies and keep a Jesus saves pamphlet nearby at all times. And take copious notes at the evangelistic training seminars.  Sure—why not!  

But there’s something deep in my spirit that begs for more.  The thought of merely compelling people into praying the sinner’s prayer seems incomplete.  Through the course of time I find myself increasingly drawn towards forming ongoing--redemptive—life giving—relationships with others.  Which brings us to the second element from Dave Ferguson’s book “B.L.E.S.S” and that is “Listen”

Ferguson points out that “Listening is one of the purest acts of love!” Author John Eldridge would add that "To be heard and to be understood are two completely different experiences." Listening carefully, lovingly, and without judgment is one of the most important gifts we can give to others. 

Isn’t it true that, when a person feels seen, safe, and supported through our presence, they will feel comfortable speaking freely about their thoughts and feelings. And so it’s not about responding to what has been said but allowing someone the safe space to express themselves without judgment. Proper listening focuses both on what has been said and what has not yet been expressed. When you pause and look closely at why someone may have difficulty expressing themselves aloud, you may hear they cry of their heart. Listen attentively, with an open mind and heart, so that you can genuinely connect with the other person when it's your turn to speak.

There was desperation in her eyes as she approached me—dressed in modest Muslim attire—a djellaba gown and a Hijab covering her head.  To speak to a strange man in public took a lot of courage.  But for Halima, it was worth the risk.  

Eventually I deciphered Halima’s strained attempt to communicate, and discovered that she was looking for an English as a second language class.  I introduced Halima to my wife Linda who would become her teacher, coach and cherished friend.  Linda didn’t just teach English…she shared life with Halima.  They went shopping, took excursions, and even prayed together.   It was a big day when Rod and Halima invited us to their apartment to indulge in a huge meal--Cuscus.  A friendship was born—and our relationships grew deeper.  Once we moved to Florida Rod and Halima came and spent a few days of vacation with us.  It was a good thing.  Through our time together we learned much about their religion, and customs, and values.  And, likewise, Rod and Halima heard about Jesus.  We never had the privilege of leading Rod and Halima to the Lord.  Time and distance has since pulled us apart.  But that’s ok.  Their story isn’t finished yet.