marcharig asks: What was your greatest disappointment in life?
My best, or my biggest? The former seems an oxymoron, and the latter is that I’m still
answering questions like this one, panning through the muck in my efforts to find a grain
of usefulness in it. Was this what you wanted for my life, father? Don’t answer that.

Anonymous asks: Edward, where do you get all of your confidence from? Do you have
any advice for a person with low self-esteem?
I’ve never suffered from low self-esteem and I’m not a psychiatrist, so I’ll put this as
simply as I can. I get all my confidence from me. Being me, thinking like me, looking like
me, considering myself the absolute most fortunate to be me. That’s not to say I think
you should go around being like me; no, I do it best, so there’s no point. It’s trite, but just
being the best version of yourself is the answer - and to hell with everyone else.

addisonoftheblacknote asks: I’m sorry, but I was a little disappointed in the placement of
the riddler trophies in Arkham City. They seemed to be pretty easy to spot and more
often than not were out in the open. Was this intentional? Did you try to maybe make
things a little easier for Batman? I felt you did such a nice job with them in Arkham
Asylum, and then lowered the bar in Arkham City.
… Is this a real question? You’re talking about a series of video games. That wasn’t me.
I was never asked, or tasked, if you like, to create anything for those games. If you had
ever seen me in real life - lucky you - you would realise that they paid me only for my
name, not for my likeness. The man sounds like someone who copied my work in high
school, which is the sum total of this character; like me, not quite me - as fake as a
counterfeit bill printed on a slice of American cheese. So whine about those dopey
Riddler trophies all you like, but don’t do it at me - if I had been the one in charge, you’d
still be looking for them now.

Anonymous asks: What was your first kiss like?
Soft, gentle, and pressed to my skin in an affectionate manner - a sign of adoration and
unconditional love. Just what one would expect, when an infant has been placed in the
arms of his mother. (chuckles)

chimneysweepsthehipstergiraffe asks: Does it pain you terribly every time the Batman
trumps you in intelligence and strength (which is almost always)?
AND
nightswing asks: If you’re as great as you claim, why is the Batman always able to catch
you?
AND
psmroguesobsessed asks: So you’re the smartest in Gotham as everyone’s said, but
why wouldn’t you have The Batman himself fell to your trap and actually defeat him?
Will the Riddler himself admit that the bat is much smarter than him?
I’m an intelligent man well acquainted with hubris, so I blame myself for my failings
rather than credit the Bat for doing anything other than turn up to punch me in the face
and smash my toys, like the thug that he is.

queen-derp-a-lot asks: Here’s a little something for you: I am the end to all relationships
alike. I am the meaning behind the glare in your eyes, and the fuel to the anger in your
stomach, yet I am a completely normal reaction. What am I?
AND
umbrella-tales asks: Riddler sir! I found quite peculiar the fact that despite your
invitations, no one seems to have submitted any riddles to you. Therefore, if I may be so
bold, I would like to present you with one of my own. It is said strength depends on the
roughness of your hits, yet dementia quickly drowns you until you call it quits. War born
royalty decaying with a long lost face. Who will regret you when you vanish without a
trace? Riddle me this, if you please, sir.
AND
anonymous asks: Alone I am bitter, but with friends I can be as sweet as a sugar
cookie. What am I?
Riddles again. Joy. Let’s get this over with. First: exceedingly vague. Could be fire, heat,
discord... or gall - a cleverer word for bile. Second: Vague to the point of obscurity. What
is this supposed to be about, a gravestone? Coins? Any kind of ancient history? We’re
talking riddles here, not another verse of Desolation Row. Third: Christ, it seems like a
baking question: vanilla, perhaps. Isn’t the point of these riddles that they be enjoyable,
or at least provide some modicum of entertainment? These are so amorphous that they
simply make me tired. I hope that the peanut gallery is at least suffering as much as I
am: that would bring me some solace.

Anonymous asks: What do you think of Two-Face?
AND
Anonymous asks: How do you feel about Two-Face?
AND
Anonymous asks: What do you have to say about working with Two-Face?
AND
Snowkhione asks: What is your relationship with Two-Face? I know there is some things
that you can’t stand about him, but really I’m curious nonetheless.
AND
Anonymous asks: It seems that you and Two-Face have become quite the popular
couple around Tumblr. What do you think of that?
AND
Anonymous asks: Why did you team up with Two-Face that one time? We all knew it
wasn’t going to work out.
Harvey’s fine in small doses but I find him rather duplicitous. (chuckles) What, you
expected a serious answer? (laughs)

valoscope asks: I’m not as familiar with your back story as I probably ought to be, but I
recalled something about you working on television game shows before your conversion
to a more criminal career, or was it work in video games? Either way, do you have any
interest in one or both of these things?
AND
nerdchicka asks: Greetings, Mr. Nygma. I heard that during one of your brief reforms,
you were hired to be a toy designer - more specifically, you designed puzzles. That
seems like it would have been amusing. Was it?
Before I became the man I am today, I used to work at WayneTek in software
engineering. Coincidentally, Jervis Tetch worked in the adjoining cubicle, though his
area of expertise was in hardware. And that’s all I have to say about that. For now.

Anonymous asks: It is starkly apparent that you are in possession of a fine sense of
humour and a rapier-like wit, so please, Mister Riddler, what is your stance on comedy?
Do you see it as a meaningless pass time for the mindless coddled masses, or as one
of the most complex, courageous, and misunderstood arts?
Courageous? I suppose it must be, getting up in front of people and hoping they will
laugh at you. I’ve always seen comedy as a distraction: what are you hiding behind that
mask of humour, what’s lurking behind the laugh… except in the Joker’s case, of course
- I already know there’s nothing there. (snickers)

jazztronic asks: Madness is doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting
different results each time. Forgive me for paraphrasing, but I’d be interested in hearing
your thoughts on the matter, given the people you encounter in your… line of work.
If there’s one thing you can say for the Rogues, it’s that we’re an optimistic bunch -
innovative, even. We may have the same goal in mind, but the methods we employ to
get there evolve every time. It’s the ‘heroes’ who do the same thing over and over,
expecting us to reform or change in some way as a result of their efforts, though we are
content to remain as we are. ‘Heroes’. You want to talk madness? There it is.