INTRO
SATAH: Welcome to Folio, an actual play podcast about solo and epistolary TTRPGs. I'm your host, Satah, and I'm showcasing multiple possible experiences of self-paced games by inviting guests to play them alongside me so I can compile our stories together. You can support the show financially at patreon.com/foliopod or ko-fi com/foliopod.
This is the final episode of our games of To Honour and Obey, "a solo tarot RPG about an Arthurian lady protecting her own" by Laurie O 'Connel. The other two lonesome expectant mothers holding down the literal forts with me are Happy Birthday and Chloe Sobel. Check out HB's games at gm36.itch.io and Chloe's games at smallstories.io.
Whenever a series ends, I post a public wrap-up on Patreon with a bunch of graphs and whatever. Today, of course, that includes a picture of the tarot card that Chloe cracks up about in this episode, so make sure you go and check that out.
GAME: ACT THREE (CONT'D)
CARD ONE
SATAH: "One of the queen's advisors brings you a letter requesting that you visit her at court. Why has she decided to take you into her confidence– confidence– and how could the secret she tells ruin you both?" Ooh! Ooh, juicy. Hell yeah. Oh, I love that.
Okay, absolutely going to pull a major arcana to see, uh… gesturing towards the secret. I pulled the Lovers. [Dramatic gasp] "Romantic or spiritual union," of course.
Is she having an affair?!
She… wants to tell me something about… an arranged marriage for her daughter. One of her daughters. She doesn't trust the, like, prince that they're looking to potentially arrange this marriage with. And she's brought me into her confidence- confidence because she has heard that I'm real good at discerning when people are telling the truth. [Chuckles]
This has filtered to her in a way that I think genuinely terrifies me at first. I'm like, "The queen is calling on me because she thinks that I'm a demon. Uh, uh-oh." But no, she's heard this in a kinder way than expected, or at least she understands it kindly. And she is deeply worried for her daughter.
And, you know, she delicately explains, like, "Of course these are matters of politics. And yet even in politics, there is leeway for danger. And avoiding it."
And "tells me a secret that could ruin us both"… what is it? Is it related to magic? Is it…
I think what it is, is that she's like, "It's extra complicated because… the King and I can't have more children… and it isn't me. He has tried to sire children with other women and it hasn't worked."
And I think she is pregnant in this moment, and so it is like, hmm. Whose kid is that? And I think that she tells me she doesn't think any of her kids are the King's? And he's convinced that, like, he just managed to– he was like, oh, it's– it's magically, like– we are so blessed. We managed to make three. This is our third. And she's like, uh-uh. There was a gap because my lover was away for a while, and then he came back and I immediately got pregnant. [Laughing]
And I'm like, why the fuck would you tell me that?!
Is it… oh god. Yeah, for the drama and to add more personal stakes to me, I think that the father of her children is my husband. Yeah, fuck it. Why not? And so this would absolutely... blow up both of our scenes.
And I think that all of this comes out in a really odd way, because I think that the queen, like– you know, she's heard that I'm good at discerning the truth, but maybe she thinks that I have to do it, like, in very specific ways, and so she wasn't expecting me to be able to see through her. So she wants to– she wants– she just wants information on this prince that her daughter is marrying, but I just– I'm like, this– these are– something's not quite right here. The questions I'm asking, I know that there should be a different answer to them.
And so all of this information just comes tumbling out, slowly, and then all at once. And it's a fucking mess.
And I feel less about it than I expected. And I, like, touch my, like, visibly pregnant belly and look at hers and sort of smile ruefully and say, in a- in a weirdly light tone that she's not expecting, "… A prince."
And she laughs and says something like, "Approximately as close to it as mine, yes."
And I agree to help her.
And later, I'll sit down and wonder why I didn't feel as much as I would have expected to learn this of my husband.
I'm going to give my strength a token for seeing through the Queen with my cool powers.
CHLOE: "Your grandmother writes to you expressing concern over something she saw in a dream. How does it relate to your plotting? Do you use this foresight to your advantage?"
So, my– I think my grandmother saw in a dream that someone was trying to steal an egg from under a chicken, and she is concerned that this means that something's going on with my baby.
And it becomes clear to me that I have been too passive. It suggests to me that someone is going to start questioning my child's legitimacy. And so I use this to… well, I use this to lead into the next card prompt, which is the Ace of Cups.
CARD TWO
CHLOE: "You realise you need eyes and ears around the castle, so you place somebody loyal to you in the kitchen staff. Who is your spy? Do they overhear anything of note?"
My spy is the daughter of my wet nurse. We grew up together, were as good friends as you can be, being in these two very different social strata, and I made sure that she came with me to the keep when I married.
And she overhears that the magician has spies in my keep. There are traitors in my staff. And they are planning to start openly questioning my child's legitimacy.
I think one of the things also that she learns is that the steward is either loyal to the magician or at least sympathetic to him and does not care for me.
HB: The Three of Cups. "Rumour has it that your handmaid has dishonoured herself with a married man-at-arms. She is loyal to you, but keeping her close could bring your own reputation into question. What do you do?" Okay. My handmaid…
You know, I think I like to keep close with my handmaids. There is a… there is a certain confidence between us, so I already know that this has indeed happened.
I think I may have put my handmaid up to this. [Laughing] I think I've been trying to get closer to my man-at-arms, and I've successfully talked my handmaid into figuring out– into trying to get to his weaknesses. And this is, I think, not under my specific orders, but I think at least the handmaid has interpreted it that way, they have started up a rather lurid affair, and she remains loyal to me, and she's asking… hmm. There is a great deal of attention coming our way, people seem to be cottoning on to this, but you know. She's in love and he is– I don't really– I don't necessarily know if he's in love.
And… hmm. I could stand to be quite bold about this. You know, do my worst, because the worst has already happened. Or the worst may have already happened. Maybe the worst is yet to come.
I think… I don't think this is something I handle well. I think basically what happens that I try to… is that I think in an effort to try and control the man-at-arms even further, I think I try to get his wife in my pocket to try and, like, you know, entertain her personally and see if I can, uh, see if I can get closer to her, make a friend of her. And I think she correctly picks up on this as me having some sort of, uh, unseemly or cursed interest in her. And I think there is a– and I think she makes a rapid exit from the castle to live with her relatives, which is kind of a solution, but does not, either, tamp down the rumours. In fact, it wildly intensifies them, as I seem to have destroyed my disloyal man-at-arms' marriage, which is directing a lot of attention my way.
I'm going to mark that with the World. I think everything in my life veers toward a disastrous conclusion, except for the wildest and strangest things I might attempt.
There is a… I think the handmaid and the man-at-arms are now basically living in sin inside of the… inside of the castle. And there is, you know– there's even the suggestion that they may have been illegally remarried. I think people are spinning the story wildly out of proportion and then the reality seems to be progressively matching up to the story.
It is– the vibes in the castle are becoming rapidly very rancid.
SATAH: My next card is the Philosopher, which is the Page, I think.
"There is another powerful woman who could help you, but you have a conflicted history with her. Who is she and do you dare lean on her for support? Do you do something to bring her into your camp?" Huh.
So this chapter, as it were, is in part about the enemies maneuvering against me, and so I think I am… these dreams are getting worse and more targeted. And more tempting. And it is starting to feel more clear to me that this is a person. There is somebody who is making me this offer. And that isn't who I'm looking to be maybe helped by… that isn't who this question is about.
[Laughs] Could genuinely be my mother. Powerful woman I have a conflicted history with.
But I think… pull a major arcana because I'm just not sure who this would be.
I pulled the Emperor. "Creating and maintaining material order."
I think this is… like, a housekeeper of sorts that we sort of inherited with the keep who still has a lot of loyalty to the last people who lived here and has been openly resentful and expressed immense distaste against changes we've made- I've made.
And I think I lean on her a bit in that, like… my dreams have been so much worse. I want to ask her about the history of the people here. I want to ask her about the former lady of the house and just be like, did she struggle with this? Is it the house? Is it the keep? What do I do?
And I think I try to basically say like, "I haven't said this directly to you before, but I hope you know that I do not call into question your authority and expertise on this house. I haven't consulted with you more because I didn't want to trouble you, and I'm realising, as of late, this may have been taken as a dismissal, and I'm deeply regretful of that. I would be interested in hearing the reasons behind why the house has been run the way it has, if you would be so kind as to explain it."
And I think this gets her on my side a little. I think she still doesn't like me very much and is distrustful. And maybe most importantly is like, no, the former lady didn't have nightmares. You're crazy. Maybe you don't belong here. And I'm like, 'kay… [Laughs]
But, you know. She chills out a bit with the snide comments and stuff and is a potential ally, and, like, if we can agree on how things should be done, they'll get done. We just have to find ourselves in alignment, and this is a good first step to that.
CARD THREE
HB: Let's put up a final card. The Queen of Cups. Ooh. "One of the queen's advisors brings you a letter requesting that you visit her at court. Why has she decided to take you into her confidence, and how could the secret she tells you ruin you both?" Hmm. Yes.
I think the fact that my name has appeared in court is like… I think the King has– you know, the King has received a letter from me and has immediately sent gold to me, which, to her, indicates that I am somebody worth taking into account.
And I think she has… proceeded to learn more about me, about my whole existence, about who I am, about my husband, and I think there are a great deal of unanswered questions about me, and she has decided to try and get me into things so that we can try and answer those questions together.
I do visit her at court. It is quite a journey. This is quite a remote keep. But I think, you know, the local people are wildly relieved that I am no longer a… I am no longer within the premises of the castle. Everybody breathes a sigh of relief, and, you know, dreads my return, whenever that might happen.
And I think she has… you know, I'm gonna draw another Major Arcana card, see what happens. Justice. Hmm. What could justice mean in this context? "Equity, rightness, probity, executive, triumph of the deserving side in law, reversed, law and all its departments, legal complications, bigotry, bias, excessive severity."
Hmm. Not clear enough by itself. Let's draw another one and kind of, you know, cross the original one with it. [Laughs] And the next one is The Fool. "Folly, mania, extravagance, intoxication, delirium, frenzy, berayment. If the card is reversed, negligence, absence, distribution, carelessness, apathy, nullity, vanity." The Fool and Justice!
Yeah, so I think the situation is… the entire thing with my husband and the King is a… maybe there is more to this than there at first seemed. There is a kind of, uh… you know, King Arthur defeated my husband and ultimately converted him into one of their allies. But I think that's not the only thing that passed between them. I think there is a… how shall I put this?
That something is not as it seems with the King. Where after his battle with my husband, he has not been quite the same as he was before. I think ever since he has been in the company of my husband, there's been a shift in his behavior. He has become a little erratic, and with him the kingdom itself has become increasingly- increasingly chaotic.
There has been a sense of the rule of law progressively eroding around the country. You know, the situation with the keep has only been one of many instances of this. There is a general sense of the entire kingdom going to– well, going to pot, essentially. Disorder at all quarters. The house of troubles is being built to its highest extent by the King and his knights as they proceed to go on increasingly unhinged quests rather than, you know, rule. Sort of, I guess, sort of in parallel to kings like, you know, Richard the Lionheart or something like that, where– I think people have not seen the King and neither his knights in many months now. They've all kind of gone off to pursue matters outside of England, outside of Albion, outside of our immediate sphere of interest, to go on increasingly expensive foreign adventures.
And I think there is a… a thing that the Queen believes and seeks my opinion of, as to where this madness might potentially originate. Does it have something to do with me? Does it have something to do with my husband specifically?
She has heard of the disquieting episode where I was left alone in my keep after– well, unbeknownst to her, but very well known to me– after devouring and tearing apart all of the servants in one of my– I guess I would call them one of my rages.
And I think, you know, moved by the Queen's- moved by the Queen's beneficence, I think I tell her everything. Everything that I know, anyway, and she listens eagerly. She too is a– she is perhaps not a trustworthy figure, but given that she would probably piece this together in time anyway, I feel I have no other choice but to tell her everything, and I think she takes it quite well!
I am going to add a token to the Tower.
SATAH: Third card is a seven. "A local witch comes to you with an offer of assistance. What is it and do you take her up on it?"
I mean… it isn't the enemy. I'm like looking side long so dramatically at my enemy card right now.
It isn't my enemy, but it is– it may as well be. It's one of her coven or students or something.
And this is the first time I think one of these offers has been fully realised. You know, I've had all of these dreams and there have been offers made in the dreams, but never like a, "Hey, I can give you better– I can strengthen you. I can make your powers better. You'll just have to give up something."
And I think it's genuinely like, I'm on a walk and she just falls into step beside me and we are talking. And I think… I share, like, a- a sad memory. Like, we– we're walking and we there are two paths to take and one goes into the city or whatever and one goes around the lake. She starts to turn into town and I say, like, "Oh I never enter town on foot," and I share like a sad memory of… being– is it– like, walking into a city as a– into town as a child and getting made fun of for it. You know? Like, oh, you're not on a horse or a caravan or whatever.
And I laugh, because I know it's minor, but it– I simply won't do it. Especially– I'm trying to keep my fear to a minimum as, you know. Touch pregnant belly.
And she's like, "Ah, of course," and we turn we keep walking around the lake, and she goes, "Ahh… a pity how those memories get in the way of things when they don't I feel like they should anymore. Don't you agree?"
I laugh and kind of nod, and then the smile fades from my face because something is starting to feel strange.
And she says, "I could take that away from you if you wanted. Or at least the feelings from under it. You would remember it, but not hold on to that feeling anymore. You might remember it a little differently. Don't you feel that would give you greater access to the things that you want to do if you weren't… held back by things like that? By memories like that?"
And I just stop walking and look at her. And she smiles, and then realises the smile isn't quite fooling me, and just drops it.
And I ask very flatly who she is. And she says, "You know me, I'm a medic here."
And I'm like, "But who are you? Who's behind you?"
And she smiles again, a genuine but terrifying one this time. And she says, like, "It doesn't need to be scary. I know that it's a large step, but large steps make long journeys, make great stories, make successes."
And I think I say something like, "Surely you're not going to make a woman with child run."
And she nods and bows slightly. She's like, "No. I will be the one to leave. But if you are ever interested in grasping your full potential…" stinging me right in the childhood, you know? My lack of potential and how long I took to meet my potential ringing in my ears. She just bows again and says, "I'm in town. You can come on foot. I'll welcome you." And she wanders off.
CHLOE: Four. "One of your enemies spreads a rumour that your son will not be your husband's child. Who do they claim you are having an affair with and how do you crush the rumor? Does it do lasting damage to your reputation?"
So this is coming from the magician originally, but via people in my staff. And they are claiming, of course, that I am having an affair with the magician, which is pretty, like, reasonably believable because, you know, whether people knew that we were lovers or not in the past, like– they knew that we were close and that we had a falling out around the time that I got married.
And I crush the rumour by… I think I expose the steward's extortion. And I manage to do it in a way where the other men of note in the castle, the knights and whatnot, can agree with me that we need to get rid of him. And I think, rather than turn him out, I think that we imprison him to show that this kind of thing won't be tolerated. Because he is… because it's not– we're not doing this explicitly about the rumour, but I think that be– like, people know where it came from and so I think the message that is being communicated is that this is basically treasonous to your lord, and it will not be tolerated.
It is possible that this does lasting damage to my reputation in the sense that now I, uh, seem very, very, like, iron fisted, but… it does shut people up. So…
EPISTOLARY
SATAH: Act three epistolary… write to the Queen!!
HB: Oh, this leads up– leads in very well to what I was just saying.
SATAH: "Using your best courtly manners, show the Queen why she and her husband were right to trust you with this piece of land." Oh, that's funny after this round. Okay.
CHLOE: "Using your best courtly manners, show the queen why she and her husband were right to trust you with this piece of land. Tell her the work that you are doing to build it up and to solidify your husband and thus his liege lord's claims.
HB: "If you dare, tell her about the whispers you have heard of those attempting to move against you.
CHLOE: "If you are truly dauntless, ask her for her assistance, be it political, financial, or something else." Mm!
SATAH: Oh, and this says "The Empress card, if you don't hold it already, is now your second strength," if something happens… so I shouldn't have shuffled those Arcana back? Or am I not supposed to use the Major Arcana deck to guide answers later? No, I am. Okay, but I guess I hold them, so I just have to look through my deck and pull the Devil out, I think. I'm not totally sure.
CHLOE: I think I'm going to talk about the work that I've done eradicating disease among the crops, ensuring that the peasants have been fed and kept well and are happy… or happy enough. Um, and that I've, um– I've worked very hard on shoring up, like, the defensive walls and things like that and, um, earning the loyalty of the people who work in the castle.
Do I… do I dare tell her about… yeah. I think I sort of– I sort of subtly mention… you know, surely– like, people will talk. People are always talking. And I think one of the things that I'm sort of implying is that I have had to figure out on my own what rumours are worth listening to and what will go away on their own.
And I think that… I'm going to ask her to send me a new steward, one who is loyal to my husband's liege lord and therefore will have my husband's best interests in mind, hopefully. I guess I'm sort of inviting her meddling, but that's fine.
HB: With how sincere I was with the Queen, there is a letter in which I lay out some of the more salient details of what has been going on with me, of why I believe that I am cursed and what I believe the curse is. How it taints everything that I do, how there is a strangeness surrounding me, much as there has been a strangeness surrounding my family for generations untold, and how this madness may indeed be contaminating not just my own bloodline, but the entire kingdom, now that, well– the King is obviously taken with his adventures and his bloody deeds in a way frankly excessive, even for a sovereign monarch.
And, you know, after having told her everything, I ask her for her assistance. Which is to say, she has substantial resources, she is able to… if she is able to do anything at all, I implore her to help.
SATAH: I mean, the Queen and I… are old friends at this point.
So what is it that I am asking her for? "Political, financial, something else." I think it is financial. Because I think that, like– I'm coming to the conclusion that– for instance, that poet who's still a problem… if all he needs is a little bit more fucking money to calm down and shut up? Great. Let's get some money.
And I think I'm just generally like, "Okay. I can continue to do my work; I just need people to trust me, and this is one way that I can get them to trust me." I'm not confident in politicking them into it. I think I just need to materially be like, "Hey. I will pay you more. Do you like me now? Cool. Relax."
And I mean, I do like– the whole like– of course, I write with my courtly manners and whatever, but, eh… we're kind of past that point? And so I make the ask relatively directly without a lot of buildup. And let's see how that goes.
HB: So, "Flip a coin if you ask for help." Now it's a question of if I was right to trust the Queen! "On heads, she provides you with assistance. The Empress card, if you do not hold it already, is now your second strength."
SATAH: [Coin clattering] I want to catch it.
HB: Let's see. On heads, that's a one to three. Are we going to get it? We are! Delightful.
CHLOE: Ooh! That's– that's even, so she is gonna help me.
SATAH: Heads!
CHLOE: Um, now I have to find the card…
HB: Oh, the Empress is deep in there– oh, there she is.
SATAH: Got it. The Hermit and the Empress. This, too, is yuri.
HB: I think the Queen is sensible. She is, uh… she is quite experienced at this time with many curses and prophecies and things of that nature.
I think she sends… not a seer, I think? But I think a holy man to, you know, attend to my needs, to soothe my, uh, to soothe my rages, and most of all to assuage the populace that i am indeed working in the King's best interest. You know, like, uh– basically sends a bishop over to smooth things over with the local populace to, uh– you know. Allocates funds to the construction of a– to the construction to the renovation and reconstruction of one of the nearby churches.
There is a real– a real sense of, oh yeah! -People are– you know. She is coming out in support of me very openly and publicly, and also marshalling her allies to help me, too, and I think this is, for once, a really good development for me.
And, you know, the bishop also presumably officiates a sneaky little marriage for the man-at-arms and annulls the previous one, for which the man-at-arms is also quite grateful for, and my handmaid is quite grateful for, because I have not, you know... completely impugned her reputation here.
CHLOE: I made the– oh, the Empress card is gorgeous!
SATAH: "You may add a token to it now and more anytime you make use of the Queen's aid in act four." Oh, cool! Okay.
CHLOE: I made the decision to switch my tokens to– it's a combination of gems from Alchemistresses and also, like, uh– token– the skull tokens from The Quiet Year.
SATAH: Purple tokens for the Queen, of course.
CHLOE: Really just, like, using all of my, like, role-playing game paraphernalia for this.
HB: I think that wraps up our Act 3 antics. Now we enter into Act 4.
GAME: ACT FOUR
PATH
CHLOE: Alright. Act 4:
ALL: wands,
SATAH:  which are feathers.
CHLOE: "Too many months have passed since your husband's…" it says return. I assume it means departure. "Too many months have passed since your husband's departure and you have not heard anything of when he will be back.
HB: "Tales of the king's battles with the Saxons and the Picts, stories of martial valour, fair magic, and foul treachery fill every hall from Bath to Tintagel. And yet, you know nothing of his survival.
SATAH: "The hour of reckoning will soon be upon you. Your enemy must move before your son is born.
CHLOE: "This act is split into four different paths, each of which represents different threats."
SATAH: "First, draw a path from the Court of Wands," okay.
CHLOE: Don't forget to add tokens, etc, etc.
SATAH: Get the court out here.
HB: I fortunately separated this already ahead of time…
CHLOE: I shuffled like shit. Um… oh the Page. Okay, we did it. Wow, this is a hilarious card; I wish you could see it. Um, it's just this, like, girl in a bikini who has apparently found treasure and… you can see her nipples in her bikini top. Um, she's wearing this like giant dagger on her hip and I'm just like… again, this is the most early 2000s– like early to mid 2000s thing I've ever seen. Anyway.
SATAH: "This determines your enemy's method of attack. You must answer prompts from this path."
HB: My path is…
SATAH: The goddess, which is the queen, right? Yes.
HB: The queen of wands, which is… the path of scandal!
SATAH: Path of scandal.
HB: [Joyful laughter]
SATAH: That tracks. Yeah.
HB: Oh boy! Oh boy.
CHLOE: So this is the path of attack. "You wake up one morning, feeling nauseous and unwell, to a terrible commotion outside. As you stagger to the window, you hear the sound of shouting and the clashing of weapons and you look outside to see that your castle is under attack, the limited defenders trying desperately to hold back the forces at your gates."
HB: The path of scandal! "Beatings,
SATAH: "poisonings,
HB: "thefts, and battles.
SATAH: "Those things are par for the course for a lady of your stature.
HB: "But everyone knows that if you really wish to harm a woman in the green hills and forests of Albion, you attack her reputation, not her person.
SATAH: "A wound heals, but a successful rumour scars forever." Yeah!
"Draw a clarification from the court of wands…" so the remaining three cards, shuffling them up again.
CHLOE: Draw a clarification. "Your attacker is…" knight: "Terrible beast. Its eyes aflame like no earthly– entirely earthly being. What is their connection to your enemy?"
I think this is a creature of my enemy's that he's created with magic. I think it's, like, an enormous bear, but sort of like a prehistoric enormous bear and I think it's un– it's under his control and it is wrecking… wrecking the castle walls.
HB: "Your scandal is…"
SATAH: Prophet. Which is… Knight? No.
HB: The king of wands.
SATAH: Prophet is king. Okay.
HB & SATAH: "You or a member of your family
SATAH: "is exposed as a traitor or oathbreaker." [Gasps]
HB: Ah. Hmm. Okay. I do love this. Hmm… is it my husband? Has something happened that has essentially made its way back here?
I'm going to drop in the major arcana again.
SATAH: "Why has your enemy found such a cruel way to ruin you?" I mean, they're trying to force me into making a big move. They want me to meet my potential, right? Accept, like, my powers. They want me to… I'm Anakin Skywalker. [Laughing] I'm Anakin Skywalker and Palpatine is like, "If your girlfriend dies of a broken heart, you will turn to the dark side." That's probably basically what Palpatine was doing. He's up to shit. He's got… irons in the fire, pivot, etc.
But yeah, I'm– they want to push me. They want to push me to a breaking point where I will either be like– because I think this is specifically about my husband, and so I think I'm basically being given the choice like, you know… you can stand by him and have this be terrible. Or you could stand by him from grasping your full power and finding a way to protect him. Or you can be like, hey! This is already pretty much as bad as it's going to get. I'm going to go become a witch. And give everything up to lead a life of magic crime. Or whatever it is.
Two out of three options, as presented there, lead to me doing what my enemy wants, so… pretty decent odds for them.
HB: The Magician. Okay. Alright. The Magician is also known as the Mountebank. It has a lot going on there.
Maybe the scandal is that I am not who I claim to be. That the nature of my curse, and you know, the very obscure nature of my origin… the strange things going on in my entire story… I think one of the things that people realise… is that I may not in fact be who I claim to be.
Or, maybe there's a simpler way to go about this, where I think what's going on is that it gets out that I was, you know… as a cursed being of some description, that I, in fact, maybe may have, you know, killed an entire castle's worth of people in a rage. That I have turned into a beast and subjected the entirety of that keep to unrighteous violence– which is contrary to how werewolves should behave, in that they should commit righteous violence against, you know, traitors, oathbreakers, and similar people who deserve it.
And I think, as a result of that, it gets out that I am cursed, basically. People are having a bad reaction to it because, well, you know, nobody wants to live under a lady who turns into a beast now and again and claims livestock and people's lives. It seems like a very bad situation for all involved.
So I think there is, you know. There are angry mobs, there are literal torches and pitchforks, there is general unrest, and I fear that the men-at-arms that I have… you know, the situation is rapidly getting out of hand.
CARD ONE
SATAH: "Next, draw two cards from the numbered wands," which is what you've heard me shuffling in the background as I talk.
CHLOE: So that's a six. "Which aspect of the attacking force is the most dangerous? How do you neutralise it?" God, I think it is quite literally its, like, physical being. It's huge. It has incredibly sharp claws and teeth. And, like, one swipe from it can open someone's guts, basically.
And "how do you neutralise"… I think I call for my forces to fall back and attack with arrows. Like, I leave it to the archers, who can be distant from this thing, because clearly, if you're in close proximity, it's going to destroy you.
HB: The two of wands. "When the scandal is exposed, it is all anybody can talk about. But which element of it is true?"
So, obviously, I did kill all of those people in that keep. This is something that I unquestionably did. It is also true that now and again, I have been transforming in the night, and my pregnancy has made it a little more unpredictable as a res– has made it a little unpredictable as well. I do not have a precise recollection of this, but I do know that there are… I do know that I have definitely eaten at least one person while I've been here.
Now, it's unclear if I am the only monster around here, but it is very clear that some of the violence and cursed vibes that are… permeate this place or down to my presence.
I'm going to add a token to the World, because I think the terrible series of events that have surrounded me this whole time… not all of it is purely a lie.
SATAH: Four. "Your enemy has twisted your previous words and actions to feed these lies. What did you do or say in the past that is now being used against you?"
I think that it's… I think I'm not the best… liar face-to-face. You know? Because I am always looking for truth and so I think that I often express it.
And so I think what it is is just that, like… when people would bring up my husband and how proud I must be of him, I would say all the right things but there would be– it would be really noticeable, the– the tinge of sorrow that I regarded it with. Like, that I was sad that he was away, or that I was here. And I often– I wasn't quite cheerful enough when I talked about how I hoped that he would be back in time to see our son be born. And this is being twisted to say that, like, I knew that something was not quite right with him.
And I think this is, in its own way, an interesting little knife in my back because, like, suddenly– the way that people have been talking about me is as if I am dangerous. I'm into… scary magic and stuff. And now it starts to become, like, "Oh, the poor dear. She's never made a choice in her life. What was she supposed to do? Her husband… who knows what he's up to? He probably dragged her into it but against her will!" and it just is, like… um! I think I actually preferred when you were all talking about me as if I had on purpose chosen to go to hell, 'cause… what the fuck?
HB: The ace of wands. Well, we already had that one, so let's… I have to explain this a little bit– the one and two are the same prompt, and I don't want the same prompt to happen twice.
Let's redraw it. Let's draw a different one.
CHLOE: Nine. "You have something up your sleeve which your attacker has not accounted for. What is it, and how does it get you an unexpected advantage?" Hmm…
I think that one of the magic that I know– that the magician must not have taught me, if he hasn't accounted for this; I must have learned it from somewhere else– is that I can also communicate with beasts. I don't think that I am able to mind control this giant prehistoric bear, but I am able to startle it, because it's hearing something from someone who is not its master. And this surprises it, which enables my people to come down on it and finally, hopefully, slay it. Shit.
SATAH: Next. Nine. "To weather this scandal, you will need the support of somebody more influential. Who do you lean on? And do they even give you the time of day?" Yes! I'm giving my token– I'm giving the Queen a token. That's my girl.
How do I– how do I… I guess I don't– I mean, I did ask for financial support… you know what I think this- this is? I think I hire new help. Like, I don't- I don't just cast all of the people out, but I reassign them and I hire new people to be closest to me, who the Queen helps me hand pick, and my my closest handmaiden helps me pick, so that they will be less likely to be swayed by all of this gossip.
Which– I think also one thing that's important here? I don't know if they're wrong about my husband. This is another thing I gotta talk to the Queen about, 'cause, like, uh-oh! She's definitely worried because she's like, ooh, if- if rumour is– if the rumours are gonna start to go around that he's fucking the Queen… or if he, you know, is indiscreet in looking to her for help getting out of this, that's a problem.
And I think that, just generally, he's kind of out of contact right now. Maybe his whole band is out of contact. But I don't know– I just– I don't know if it's true. I- I'm just not sure yet. It might be. The prompt does say exposed as a traitor or oath breaker, so… we'll see.
But yeah, the Queen and I are in this together. We're besties and she helps me hire people who will be nice to me.
HB: Right, so. The second one is the six of wands. "A family member writes to you in desperation, suggesting a way to salvage your reputation. What is the suggestion? Does it work?" [Giggling]
My mother writes to me and her suggestion is to blame it on my man-at-arms. That he is indeed the cursed one, that he has had evil intentions this whole time, from his unlawful cohabitation with a maid to his various other crimes that I could undoubtedly try and pin on him.
And I think… it wouldn't have worked if it was just me here. However, the Queen's agents are also here, and I think I'm going to drop a token on the Empress, because between the Queen supporting me, her bishop also being willing to speak on my behalf, and just a general kind of authoritative support for my rule…
I think what we do is that we frame our man-in-arms. I think we plant a wolfskin in his quarters. We launch an investigation. We find evidence that he has been– well, "evidence," you know– that he has been going out at night and attacking livestock and doing that sort of thing.
And I think what we do is that, obviously, we punish him by death, which my handmaid is very broken up about, but well, you know… if needs must. I really need to look out for number one here.
And it seems that the Queen agrees. There's only one way to restore order. And thus what we do is we condemn an innocent man to death in order to preserve the reputation of the cursed monarchy.
And, you know. It's a fairly workable suggestion. I think the crowd at least is satisfied by the fact that we have properly at least killed somebody about all this, even if maybe they are… a little skeptical that this is indeed what is at work here. However, you know, every authority figure seems to agree to this, and the bishop seems to insist that God's will has been done here, so it'll have to do for now.
[Contented sigh] That leads us to...
SATAH: Now we go to…
GAME: ACT FIVE
CHLOE: We go to act 5, the Major Arcana.
SATAH: Act 5, the Major Arcana.
HB: Act 5, the Major Arcana.
SATAH: "Now you only have one more task. You have fought as hard as you were able, but victory is still uncertain. One moment will decide everything.
HB: "Count up the tokens on your strength and your enemy. Whichever is higher has the advantage."
CHLOE: So, well, I have the advantage. I have four tokens on my strength and three on my enemy.
HB: So I have nine tokens on my strengths and five tokens on my weaknesses.
SATAH: I think I arguably should have given the enemy a token for specifically the, like, twisting of my words one, so I'm going to do that. That still leaves me at three tokens on my enemy and five in total on my strength. I had three on me and two on the Queen. I probably could have been a little bit more generous with tokens across the board, but that is okay. I feel as though it probably would have… that feels about right, I think for for how that went.
HB: Now, "shuffle all your major arcana cards back into one deck."
SATAH: Again, assuming not the strength and enemy… oh, no, it says, "Whichever of you collected the most tokens will generally be victorious, unless you draw your strength or your enemy from the major arcana deck," so I do in fact have to shuffle those back in.
I haven't been shuffling the strength and enemy back in because it says that you should put a token on them every time, so… I think that this is correct. I think that I should have had them until the very end of the game.
HB: Back into the deck they all go. Shuffle the stack and draw a card. "This is your ending."
SATAH: Okay.
HB: [Sigh of preparedness]
CHLOE: What is my ending?
HB: I'm going to shuffle the stack three times…
CHLOE: The Emperor! That's exciting. That's fun.
SATAH: [Huge gasp] No way!
HB: [Abrupt laugh] Yes. Beautiful! Wonderful!
SATAH: I pulled the Sun…
HB: I have drawn the World! [Laughing]
SATAH: How cool is that? After I set up, like, having sun powers… and I'm having a son… [Laughs]
HB: Amazing!!
SATAH: Oh, fuck yeah. Alright.
HB: Beautiful! Wonderful! Incredible!
CHLOE: What does the Emperor sort of imply?
SATAH: The Sun. "Mother nature. Consciousness. Inner child." I have one of those! It's a baby that I'm having! [Light dry heave] Oh god, it got me again.
CHLOE: "Leadership, responsibility, structure, stability." Okay.
SATAH: "Use the card to describe how you vanquish your enemy or are vanquished by them. Whichever of you collected the most tokens will generally be victorious, unless you draw your strength or your enemy from the major arcana deck. If this happens, describe how you gain or lose the advantage in the final moments."
HB: Yeah… describe how I gain or lose the advantage in the final moments. I think… oh boy. Oh boy.
I think my son is born, and my curse is not only passed down to him, he embodies it in a way that I never have.
And I think what happens is… I suppose how I would describe him is kind of a beast in human form, which is not immediately apparent. You know? Every- every possible thing was against him turning out in any kind of good way. This was always what the prophecy referred to, even though it was not clear at the time.
Uh, I am… I survive. It would be too easy for me to die at this point.
SATAH: I'm a tragic ending type of person, but drawing the Sun is so magical and crazy that I… absolutely kill it. I– I need to check my character's name again…
HB: I think I survive for a long time afterward as I raise my son inside of this keep.
SATAH: Lady Astigan Heladin will live forever! [Laughs] No, that's not true. But she does do this really well.
I think the witch, the one who's been appearing to me in my dreams, comes to visit me.
She's in the hall, the hall that I avoid. I'm taking my long way around it one night. The baby is super active, and I just have this feeling that I'm going to give birth shortly. I'm walking around trying to keep, like– work out some antsiness. And also potentially, like, I hear that this might make the baby happen. I would love if the baby just happened. [Laughs]
And I'm taking the long way around, and it hits me that I shouldn't. That I should walk into that hallway.
And I walk to that hall, and the moon is framed perfectly at the end again, and then it gets cut as somebody steps out in front of it– maybe materialises in front of it, even– just inside the window in the hall, and I'm at the other end, looking at her.
And she steps forward. I think she's also visibly pregnant. And she tells a story of seducing my husband, getting his secrets. And I smile. Sadly– there is a little bit of sadness in it, but it's a genuine smile.
And I say, "Oh, you didn't have to go that far. You're not the only one."
And she kind of blinks and looks surprised.
And I look at her, you know, pregnant belly and I'm like, "In fact, your little one will have many more siblings. Perhaps more than even I know."
And she steps toward me and she's like, "Well, then that's perfect. We're already sisters. You will lose everything. Come with me. You could be so powerful. You don't have to be contained."
And I… I think that I look off behind her. And I am thinking about it. Genuinely. And I think that I tell her, "You've misread me. The things in my life that I want to change are not things you can offer me. I know what I am. I know who I am. I know that I'm good. I don't need more to prove that to myself. I already have it. It's actually something so small, something I can hold in the palm of my hand. I don't need it to be bigger. I don't need to be bigger. I don't want to pay your cost.
"I'll be blunt, I don't trust you. I don't trust your tallies. I've been learning a lot about ledgers and the ways that they can become unbalanced, the ways that numbers written down on paper can be different than the number of coins in a purse. I think I'll find my own way to realising my full potential. I don't think I need you to show me."
And she steps forward again and kind of snarls and very much has like a, "Oh, you fool," moment. And I think my… my trusted maid appears with a torch that was lit by the sun. It's that flame that's been passing from thing to thing, lit directly by the sun.
And she just stands– she's not coming into the hall, because it will blow out, but she's standing behind me, and I think she just says, "M'lady, I heard that you were restless. May I escort you to the kitchen for a drink?"
And I just smile at my enemy, at this moon witch… and I just walk away, I think. I go and grab some water. And it's not huge, you know, but it's enough. She thought that she had me so low that I would have no choice but to fall in line with her, but I did. I did have a choice. And I didn't fall in line with her.
CHLOE: I think that my husband arrives right in time, leading a group of knights and soldiers from the royal forces. They arrive– like, it is coincidental, but it is right on time, and then– they may have been escorting my new steward that the queen has sent me. And they're able to surprise the giant prehistoric bear from behind and bring it down through sheer numbers,b ecause the bear is also, like– now the bear is being attacked on all sides.
HB: I think my husband never returns and neither does the King. We are left inside of this keep, and I… watch over the keep. I have gotten rid of all of my detractors. I have taken control of the nearby place. The Queen has supported me through all of this.
SATAH: "Now decide what happens next. Do you live? Do you die? Is this the end of your story? You've not been born in a time where your fate can be solely in your hands, but despite that, you have always had choices, and they have always meant something."
Yeah.
HB: I think what happens is that my son grows up across the following years and becomes a monster unlike anything I could have ever been myself. He has grown up in poisoned soil. He has come from a terrible origin.
He is the fulfillment of the prophecy. He will bring ruin to England and beyond.
It's unclear if he will be the next King, or if in the future that we inhabit we will even have Kings of England at all. And maybe that's a good thing. But for us, he represents a collapse of the old order.
SATAH: I think my husband was, indeed, a traitor. But my girl, the Queen, has my back, and makes it very clear that I had nothing to do with this, and every cruel thing that anyone has ever said about me was his fault. And this becomes fact very quickly, especially as I've been rectifying some of my negative relationships with a little bit of scratch. Thanks, Queenie!
I don't stay… at this keep. I think that the Queen… I'm trying to decide if she brings me into her court as like a handmaiden or something, or if she marries me off to somebody she trusts to keep me close. I did say I'm a little bit older, so it might be difficult to do a marriage thing… and I don't have that much in my history that would make me, like, a great catch politically, except for my connection with her.
So I think that she just– she marries me to somebody, like– to some relatively mundane guy who also works for her, and she brings me into the court to raise my kid and work for her and with her.
I'm a great person to have around as a serving maid, honestly, because, like, if the King is doing political dealings with somebody who's lying to him, I can catch a lot of that as I'm refilling some goblets and stuff. [Laughs] And I can let her know, and she can do what she needs to do to convince him. Chain of command.
CHLOE: I do live. There's nothing– there's nothing in the game that suggests that I don't live, I guess, that I've played. I live and my husband has come back to me.
And I think, in a way, that does make this the end of my story. He's back to take his rightful place as… the leader of this castle, and I… fade into history or legend as a footnote.
When they tell the story of the giant prehistoric bear and the battle between my husband and the magician, my mention is just going to be that I was in the castle, like, helping lead the attack. No name, no more details.
This is the most important thing I will ever do, by some measures.
SATAH: And I think that's it. I do okay for myself.
HB: And in bringing about the end of the world, I feel that I have discharged my duty, at the very least. I have honoured and I have obeyed. So it is, and so it will be.
CHLOE: And that is the game for me!
HB: [Sighs] And there we go! The World… oh boy, the World. Love to draw the World into being, like, a terrible thing. Or conversely, it would have been drawing the Tower and it would have been a good thing. I am so delighted.
It is the end of the journey, the end of the world. We have successfully created a separate eschatology for this particular version of Arthuriana. I feel like I kind of dipped into, like, you know, a little bit of Third Crusade stuff in there at the end, but that's specifically because that's the part of history that I know the most about. However, I'm really happy with where this ended up.
SATAH: I know that in many ways my unfamiliarity and discomfort– obvious discomfort– with this genre space and even narrative probably meant that I told a story that didn't quite align with maybe what the game… would have been intended for, but I did have a fantastic time with it. I thought that the prompts, especially, were so well done to… give a lot of space, like… "here's what happens. Do you react in this way or this way, and then what happens?" type of thing, like, every- everything was constructed really well to allow you a lot of choice in how you respond to things and have it still make sense.
CHLOE: I enjoyed that! I love… sad women… and such like. And I'm glad I got to use my tarot cards that I suck at shuffling.
HB: What a delightful game this was. Truly love to pick this up and try to think about fucked up little courtly intrigue.
SATAH: I'm really glad that I played this. It isn't something that I generally would reach for on my own, obviously, just because of everything that I've described here of, like… my difficulty and how unintuitive I find telling stories in this space, so I'm really glad that I had this motivation to do it, because that was cool and absolutely not a story that I would have ever told on my own without prompting, and I enjoyed it a lot. 
And holy shit, that moment where I pulled the Sun at the end?! Come on. That is fucking tabletop magic. That rules. Yeah. This was lovely. I'm glad that– I'm glad I got here.
HB: Good luck to my beautiful, beautiful son. I hope he eats everyone.
OUTRO
SATAH: This has been Folio, an actual play podcast about solo and otherwise self-paced TTRPGs. To find where you can find the show, check out foliopod.carrd.co. Sign up as a paid member at patreon.com/foliopod to vote on games and get early access to the bonus feed with edited audio-only versions of livestreams a little while after they happen and occasional other stuff.
HB has games at gm36.itch.io and you can hear them on Indie Mixtape, a Moonshot Network podcast about indie games.
Chloe has games at smallstories.io, including the upcoming Within the Walls, a Gothic fiction inspired haunted house hack of Good Society, and you can follow him at chloesobel on twitter or smallstoriesgames.bsky.social.
I'm Satah and I have games at satah.itch.io. Ooh! Emphasis. Interesting. You can find my work generally at gaygothvibes.online and follow me on Bluesky at posatahchips.gaygothvibes.online.
This week, HB and Chloe and I finished our games of To Honour and Obey by Laurie O'Connel. Everything I mentioned here is linked, as always, in the show notes. Thanks so much for listening. Take care out there.
POST-CREDITS
HB: Anyway! Gonna clap one more time… just for the fun of it. [Three claps]