Ep. 2 | Infiltration - Ham Crusaders Announcer Guy (Ryan): Last time on the Empire Initiative! Following the successful abduction of Lord Saxton, the Ham Crusaders took a brief respite at Castle Rend. Dart visited his beloved children and made an unexpected plea to Edmond to show mercy. Reign declared Castle Rend a safe haven for Lilac and all others persecuted by Lord Saxton. And on the dance floor, Zavari finally revealed to Reign the tragic story of her death and subsequent bargain with Asmodeus. Once the party was over, it was time to return to Bedegar City and finish what they started. This is episode two, Infiltration. DM (Shanna): You feel a shift in your diplomats pouch. Zavari (Samaria): Oh how many? Reign (Rachel): They are probably, like, drawn. Like who drew these? Like they're not pictures. Zavari (Samaria): It's so realistic. DM (Shanna): Roll a D12. Reign (Rachel): I'm receiving them via message Reign (Rachel): One.. Two.. Zavari (Samaria): Oh! Reign (Rachel): Three.. Zavari (Samaria): Oh, my God, I'm so glad Zavari doesn’t know what's going on. Reign (Rachel): Six. Seven. Eight. Zavari (Samaria): Oh my God. DM (Shanna): So they're like those, like those thin mini canvases. You know what I'm talking about. Reign (Rachel): Painted and signed by himself? DM (Shanna): Um, it's, uh, it's initials. It's initials. So you don't really know who it's.. But the initials say DW* Reign (Rachel): DW? I'm like.. Dude, I've been thinking about Art for the past 24 hours. Zavari (Samaria): Dude! DM (Shanna): Hey, she became a master at making tiny paintings. Reign (Rachel): Oh. Uh, can't even. My brain is so blown. Um, well, I have nothing to return because I’m not an Umbermoor Heir, I can't afford that, but I got eight of them, and not like they're all different. Yeah, I haven't looked at them. I haven't examined them. Especially if it's, like.. DM (Shanna): Not all explicit. Reign (Rachel): I just wanted to make sure nothing was, like, critically major. DM (Shanna): Yeah. No, I won't go into detail, but they're not.. they're not all explicit. And, um, they're all different. And there will be like a note with, you know, uh, *MUAH* and it’s gonna say “these are some I have lying around. I hope that's okay”. Reign (Rachel): Oh, my God, it's my guilty pleasure. Apparently, I was.. DM (Shanna): Xarus was your guilty pleasure Zavari (Samaria): Oh my God! DM (Shanna): My God! Zavari (Samaria): Make that a song.. Or a poem.. DM (Shanna): You're my guilty pleasure Zavari (Samaria): It writes itself. Reign (Rachel): Uh, yeah. Sorry. This is Reigns “currently guilty pleasure”. DM (Shanna): I imagine it to be mostly, like, pretty and not like, you know, raunchy. If that makes sense. Reign (Rachel): Okay. Noted. Um.. DM (Shanna): Tasteful. Reign (Rachel): Not Tace-ful, but.. That's for you.. Reign (Rachel): So those are going to be tucked away. Um, I send back, I don't know, more kisses.. Zavari (Samaria): Smiley face Reign (Rachel): Big Smiley face.. Maybe we can get some, like, portraits of me done, like after our date or something like that for you. Zarus (Shanna): Yes! Reign (Rachel): Yes, because I got an Nat 20 and so I feel like.. DM (Shanna): You did? Reign (Rachel): Yeah. On that on my first roll. Like how he like if, if like he could send nudes I got a nat 20. So I feel like she's like into it. And so she would also.. Zavari (Samaria): Reciprocate? Reign (Rachel): Reciprocate. DM (Shanna): He falls to his knees. But yeah, that's something that may happen. That probably happens like the evening, you know, in the middle of the night or something. Reign (Rachel): No. No time anytime soon Reign (Rachel): During the day? Zavari (Samaria): Bright and earlier. Reign (Rachel): Next to the charcuterie, why not? DM (Shanna): I mean, hey. Zavari (Samaria): Next to my salad?! DM (Shanna): You know, I think D.W. would be down. Probably don't often get fed when they're working. Actually, they probably always do, because it takes a long time. Zavari (Samaria): Yeah. DM (Shanna): But yeah, I mean, if you guys are okay with advancing to the morning and is bright and early, except, um, yeah, no, it's actually not so bright if it's really sort of cloudy, dingy day.. there's like some dust rolling in from the mountainside or something, and it just seems like the air smells a little like earthy. And it's not raining, but it just, like, seems like it will any moment Zavari (Samaria): Mhm. What a beautiful day. Reign (Rachel): We needed this. DM (Shanna): That was amazing. That could probably like to be the joke to end the podcast on. Yeah, actually I was like now.. now.. now.. Now that I mention it. Like Dart probably also likes this humidity. Zavari (Samaria): Everybody's like, this is a great day. DM (Shanna): Yeah, everybody. Everybody in the castle is like “It’s gonna rain today. Look out for, you know, for the rain. There’s gonna be a storm”. Reign (Rachel): So Reigns like “It's a rainy day”. That's a future Ham fact. DM (Shanna): Yes, Reign. Reign-y day. Um. So what is the.. what are the what are the group's thoughts? You see Penna, like, she's kind of like, walking really fast, and she's like, looks like she has something tucked under her cloak. She didn't realize anybody would be up this early. Zavari (Samaria): Good morning Penna! Reign (Rachel): Good morning. Penna (Shanna): “Good morning”. And she hurries off. Dart (Ryan): We should probably figure out how we're going to rescue Miss Honeycut. Because I kind of implied to Edmond that we could march on Bedegar city. Zavari (Samaria): What to do Dart (Ryan): But, you know, we also talked about having a trial for Lord Saxton. Zavari (Samaria): Uh, okay. Dart (Ryan): And I was thinking that one possible way to do that would be to march on the city with Lord Saxon in tow. And once we show that we have captured him, maybe we can get what's left of his forces to surrender the city to us. Um, and then we can hold the trial there and rescue. I mean, if we get them to surrender the city, we'd get Zola back because his forces would give up the prison. But that's a big if. Zavari (Samaria): Yeah. How? I guess if we did that. How.. like, what is our force count? Like.. Dart (Ryan): It's a good question because when we heard that Lord Saxton was trying to rally an army to come invade us, we talked about doing the same thing, but then we decided to just infiltrate a small team of us and go get them, which we did. So I feel like our two options are to either try and leverage Lord Saxton to get his forces to surrender the city, or mount a second infiltration mission to try and get into the prison and teleport out with Zola like we did with Lord Saxton. But then we have to convince Edmond to be patient again and trust him to stay at Castle Rend with Lord Saxton and not do anything foolish. DM (Shanna): Do you have Razelax, your Knight, in the room with you, out of curiosity? Dart (Ryan): Uh.. DM (Shanna): While you guys are discussing this.. Reign (Rachel): I think he’s probably protecting.. DM (Shanna): Or is it just three of you? Dart (Ryan): I feel like when we're at Castle Rend we are having, uh, like, we, the three of us are like the head. But we are not the only ones on, like, the council of decision making, because we need input from other people. Reign (Rachel): You mean Edmond? Dart (Ryan): We said we take the council from, or we’d include Edmond on some of the decision making processes. Razalax is my sorn.. sworn right hand man, but he's also like a knowledgeable.. Zavari (Samaria): He’s a knight isn’t he? Dart (Ryan): I don't know if he's a knight. I don't know if he's necessarily a knowledgeable field commander, but I value his opinion. Zavari (Samaria): He has wisdom and that's important to us. Dart (Ryan): And then Tace, I guess.. Zavari (Samaria): The main magic person other than me. Dart (Ryan): Yeah Zavari (Samaria): I’m obviously out.. Tace is an Archmage, I'm sorry Morag.. Dart (Ryan): Or I guess the question is, do we feel that taking down Lord Saxton was like a “cutting the head off a snake” type situation? And if we go back. We can leverage his defeat into retaking the city. Reign (Rachel): I think Edmond wants to march on the city. Right? Dart (Ryan): Yeah. Reign (Rachel): So I feel like we need to have the crew go in first. This elite crew that goes in first, that, um, uh, gets Viola, uh, or Zola Honeycut, um. Or just, like, scopes out.. what.. what's happening. And then the next day, because that would happen at night and then the next day. Edmond would return the forces and Razalax to Bedegar. Zavari (Samaria): Mhm. Dart (Ryan): Question is, how many people do we have Zavari (Samaria): or do we need to like get more forces? Because that's going to take time. Reign (Rachel): Because if we can.. DM (Shanna): I don’t think you have a have a ton, because like last time you had hired people, most of those people left. You had peasant levies. A lot of those people died. And then now. So you have I know you have at least one unit of like spellcasters for sure, because you guys had saved a bunch of spellcasters. And so you have a unit of them. But like currently you could probably you could probably rally peasant levies. Um, I do believe it takes like a few days to do so. Reign (Rachel): Troglodytes are not going DM (Shanna): If you want to.. Oh, yeah. You do have.. That's true. You do have a unit of troglodytes. That is true. They they would count as a unit if you use them that way. Um.. Reign (Rachel): I don't know if they're ready for that kind of warfare DM (Shanna): But, um. Right. It's a lot. It could be a lot. Um, but other than that. Yeah. I mean, you could hire forces again, but it would also still take time, like, you know. Reign (Rachel): So I feel like.. DM (Shanna): So especially right now, The Clock is kind of hurting because they don't have their leader, and The Clock is the one who got you guys the mercenaries before. And, you know, Zavari (Samaria): They’ve helped us out DM (Shanna): The clock is ticking on them as well, which, I mean, you know. They, they might have like contacts within the city of Bedegar. That you could try to, you know, speak with or something if you know. Dart (Ryan): So realistically, we need Edmond to stay in the castle. DM (Shanna): Okay. Dart (Ryan): Guard our very valuable prisoner while we go get the head of The Clock, free them, and that will empower us to gather forces to march on the city. And we still have the leverage of Lord Saxon. But once we back that up with people, it'll be much easier to take the city, especially if we take down some of their forces while we're on our rescue mission. Zavari (Samaria): Yeah, I agree with that. Dart (Ryan): Um, seems like a reasonable plan. Reign (Rachel): Can you say the first part again? I'm sorry. Reign (Rachel): So we need to have Edmund and Razalax and Tace and everybody stay. They'll keep Lord Saxon contained and our prisoner until we're able to rescue The Clock Lady. Reign (Rachel): Can we take Tace with us? Do you think Tace would leave? Zavari (Samaria): We can ask. Dart (Ryan): I feel like we want Tace to be preparing… Reign (Rachel): It's true. But I'm scared to leave him at The castle with Saxton Dart (Ryan): We need someone to prepare a teleportation thing so we can get back quickly with Zola Reign (Rachel): Okay. That's true. I don't know what.. Zavari (Samaria): So we need to ask him for a scroll. Reign (Rachel): Reign is like.. DM (Shanna): Tace can also, you know, like, look after, you know, Saxton or something too, Reign (Rachel): But no, like, because Tace like.. Zavari (Samaria): We don’t know what.. DM (Shanna): He's doing there with Saxton nor Edmond. I guess Razalax is there. Reign (Rachel): Like, only the only person that, like, Dart (Ryan): They need to understand that he's our leverage. And as much as they want vengeance, we've agreed to have a trial. Zavari (Samaria): Yeah, everybody was fine that Reign (Rachel): Mmhm. Dart (Ryan): And.. Reign (Rachel): okay, so reign is like. Zavari (Samaria): I don't think Tace is the type to go and kill Saxton. I will put that out there. Reign (Rachel): That's what reign was just like. “If you.. Zavari (Samaria): I vouch for him completely. Reign (Rachel): If you trust him, I trust you. And like, Zavari (Samaria): Zevari Like, kind of looks at you a little weird. She, like, does not know how to take that. She's like. Reign (Rachel): And she sits there as quietly process. DM (Shanna): It's a big step in a big role. Dart (Ryan): Well, I will put Razalax in charge of making sure our prisoner stays our prisoner. Um, Rasalax (Shanna): it would be an honour. Dart (Ryan): Edmund already has agreed that it would be wise to have a trial. And it's best to have a.. to.. to justice being seen being done. And so it would be wise to have that trial once we've taken Bedegar city, so that he can show his people. Him doing the thing.. Reign (Rachel): and it being.. Doing it just and fair. Dart (Ryan): So doing it beforehand wouldn't do him any good. DM (Shanna): Yeah, Dart (Ryan): Because nobody would see it happen. And tace needs to understand that there are bigger fish to fry than just his personal vendetta. Zavari (Samaria): He didn't say that he wanted to kill the guy, Dart (Ryan): but he's got good reason to want to. Zavari (Samaria): But he also likes the idea of justice being served and all that. Dart (Ryan): Okay. Then we just need to, uh, do the the rescue mission. And that's that's our first priority, I guess, because we can't put any of our plans into motion until we've restored the power of The Clock. Agreed? Reign (Rachel): Agreed. Zavari (Samaria): Super Agreed. Dart (Ryan): Okay. Reign (Rachel): Who's going to tell Edmond? Dart (Ryan): I did, I will. That retaking The Clock gives us their backup. Plus, potentially we could. That's another thing we never talked about. Was reaching out to the Umbermoors for reinforcements. Now that we have taken down Lord Saxton. DM (Shanna): Yeah. Edmond had expressed wanting to do Dart (Ryan): it was it was a we could say, you know, reach out to them and let them know that in the coming weeks we'll be making our move on Bedegar City and we could use their support. Zavari (Samaria): Okay. Dart (Ryan): And while they're getting the reinforcements to Castle Rend. we can go off and do this mission. And by the time we return, The Clock will be restored. The Umbermoors will be with us, and we'll be ready to march on Bedegar City. And once we've taken it back. We can have the trial, then move on to dealing with blood harvest Vrinn. So we will not be able to get into more information about him until we restore The Clock. Anyway, Reign (Rachel): Restoring the clock is the answer. Zavari (Samaria): And did we kind of decide we want to do infiltration? Dart (Ryan): I mean, I don't think we have. Reign (Rachel): Worked the first time Dart (Ryan): I don't think the three of us are strong enough to take on the city's forces, even with their head guy Samaria: gone, Dart (Ryan): gone. There's still a sizable number of soldiers there. Reign (Rachel): Mhm. There could be a vice bad guy. Dart (Ryan): There could be. We don't know if things are in chaos there or if Zavari (Samaria): you can only be so lucky. Dart (Ryan): Security is heightened due to the last infiltration. We won't know that until we return. That seems like a reasonable plan to me. Zavari (Samaria): Yeah. Dart (Ryan): How long did it take us to get to Bedegar city? Zavari (Samaria): Like, half a day, I think. Reign (Rachel): Um, Zavari (Samaria): we can get um.. teleportation spells made for us. DM (Shanna): I think it took a couple of days, actually. Zavari (Samaria): Oh, really? DM (Shanna): Yeah, cause that.. like, probably about two days.. Dart (Ryan): Okay. DM (Shanna): You guys were riding quite a lot, You guys were really running your horses hard Dart (Ryan): So we reach out to your family and tell them that if they support Edmond, we can put him back in control of Bedegar. Reign (Rachel): I feel like if you were like um. You're helping a usurper. Err.. not helping a usurper, but like helping you Zavari (Samaria): Dethrone a usurper Dart (Ryan): helping restore the, uh, the rightful aristocracy. And in doing so would put another ally in your guys's corner. Mutually beneficial. Okay. Um, is there anything we need to get together besides tace getting the teleportation scroll and you sending the Umbermoor letter? I am, I've talked to Edmond and Razalax. They know the plan there. DM (Shanna): Oh. Edmond wants a diplomats pouch. Dart (Ryan): Edmond wants a Diplomats pouch? Zavari (Samaria): Not a bad idea. DM (Shanna): Let me start. Let me start writing some letters, he said. Because, you know, I can reach out. I want to reach out to the Umbermoors. Dart (Ryan): I gave you 7000 gold to do with what you will. Edmond (Shanna): I can't go anywhere. Dart (Ryan): That's a good point. Zavari (Samaria): There isn't a mall. Edmond (Shanna): No Zavari (Samaria): No Third place. Dart (Ryan): Okay, well, obviously he'll be able to do something with that money if he's able to correspond with people. So a diplomatic pouch seems reasonable. On the other hand, I really prefer to read all of his letters before they are sent off. So he doesn't say anything really stupid. Edmond (Shanna): But you're never here. Dart (Ryan): What I meant was.. Reign (Rachel): He could send them to him. He reads it and he can like.. Dart (Ryan): The um.. the art form of diplomacy is a learned skill. One that needs to be practiced and guided by a learned hand. Edmond (Shanna): I am practically an adult, I deserve privacy. Dart (Ryan): I don't disagree, but diplomatic communications impact more than just yourself. They impact all of us. And so what gets said to who kind of needs to be a group decision. That's why we have these council meetings. No one does anything just on their own willy nilly. Edmond (Shanna): Indeed. Dart (Ryan): I almost never do anything without Reign and Zavari's approval unless Charlene's involved. In which case, it's none of their business. Reign (Rachel): She's a real branch. Edmond (Shanna): Well Yeah. Every man has private matters. I mean, I don't. And he looks kind of sad for a second. Dart (Ryan): But you will. Edmond (Shanna): Yeah. Dart (Ryan): You will. Particularly once we restore you to your rightful place in Bedegar City, which we are working on. So.. Edmond (Shanna): Then I'll have many maidens Dart (Ryan): Sure.. Edmond (Shanna): It’s normal to like girls. Reign (Rachel): It's true. I feel the same. Dart (Ryan): Your position doesn't entitle you to them. It just makes you more enticing. Edmond (Shanna): Oh, you're trying to say that I was, like, entitled. I just thought I was saying that, like, I'd be more popular. Dart (Ryan): I just want to make sure you're being respectful. Edmond (Shanna) I just think, you know, girls will think. I mean, girls will think I'm cool. Dart (Ryan): That's probably true. Edmond (Shanna): Yeah, great. Dart (Ryan): Remember that, You know, my kids are around, and every adult here needs to be a good example to them, including you. Notice how I just called you an adult. Edmond (Shanna) It did not slip past me. Reign (Rachel): Mhm. DM (Shanna): Edmond is impressed. Zavari (Samaria): I want to say DM (Shanna): this is the most you’ve ever praised Edmond.. pretty much. Dart (Ryan): I just want to make sure that Hespiros and Waltor have good examples to look up. Edmond (Shanna): Yeah. You're right. I don't know about. You know, I don't know about Hespiros. He could be down a dark path. Dart (Ryan): That's my responsibility. Edmond (Shanna): I just.. I was watching for it. That's all I'm saying. Dart (Ryan): I know Edmond (Shanna): He’s like a brother to me. Dart (Ryan): Well, that's very sweet. Edmond (Shanna): You know, I lost my brother. Dart (Ryan): That's very sad. Reign (Rachel): Isn’t Hespiros like 17? Zavari (Samaria): He's like 14. DM (Shanna): Uh, Hesperus is like. Is like Edmond's age. Like 12. Zavari (Samaria): Oh.. oops DM (Shanna): Oh, yeah. Hespiros might be like 13 now . Actually, he's probably a little bit older than Edmond, but Edmund's older brother was, like, six years old than him. Reign (Rachel): Mmhm.. You want to tell us about him? Edmond (Shanna): Um, not right now. Reign (Rachel): Okay. Dart (Ryan): Hespiros just seems older because he takes on a very paternalistic role with his little brothers. DM (Shanna): Yeah.. Reign (Rachel): that makes sense DM (Shanna): That makes sense. Yeah, I agree. And he is. He is, like, one of the older kids. Like a lot of them are pretty young. But there are older kids than Hespiros. Dart (Ryan): Yeah. I feel like Victor was probably the oldest because he joined the city watch. And they don't just take kids. Zavari (Samaria): That was a grown man. Reign (Rachel): If they do, we're changing that. DM (Shanna): Yeah, that.. that makes sense. Dart (Ryan): Yeah. I have seven other kids to be named. So we'll get to that eventually. Dart (Ryan): You know what, Edmund Wanting a diplomatic pouch reminds me of “who are you always texting everyone you know is here”. Reign (Rachel): I hope he's not going to be like Boyle in Brooklyn Nine-Nine. He was just like, that's all these, like, massive texts. DM (Shanna): But, like, when you think about it, like, other kids don't have diplomats pouchs, like, you know, Dart (Ryan): other kids aren't, uh, going to be in charge of people Zavari (Samaria): A Baron Dart (Ryan): like he needs he needs to learn how to use it responsibly. And you can't learn how to use something responsibly if you don’t have it at all. It's not a it's not a toy. It's a tool. And it needs to be used responsible for that. DM (Shanna): Yeah, I got it. Dart (Ryan): Be real shame if you were, I don't know, sending illicit paintings of yourself to people. Reign (Rachel): I didn’t send shit! Dart (Ryan): I’m just saying, who does that? Zavari (Samaria): Zevari’s like, what are you talking about? Reign (Rachel): How do you know about that? Dart (Ryan): I don't know anything. DM (Shanna): Just the Reign (Rachel): Receiver of MY illicit, uh, not illicit because their consented photos. Zavari (Samaria): Explicit. Reign (Rachel): Explicit. Not Illicit. Dart (Ryan): Just saying some of us had the decency to crawl into a tree before we do things, that’s all I’m saying. Reign (Rachel): Purr..because the tree is what you're doing. Edmond (Shanna): I don't understand Dart (Ryan): You will when you're older. And also a frog. Edmond (Shanna): Oh, well. Okay.. Wait a minute, are you going to turn me into a frog? Dart (Ryan): I mean, magic exists in this world. The possibilities are limitless. Do you want to be a frog? Edmond (Shanna): Uh.. he’s like looking you up and down? Uh, no. Dart (Ryan): This is my maximum height. We don’t get any taller than this. Edmond (Shanna): Um, no, no offense, but, um. No. Dart (Ryan): Offense taken. DM (Shanna): Mind you, he's seen you like eating regular food. Dart (Ryan): Bugs Just remind me of home. Zavari (Samaria): Oh.. Dart (Ryan): bugs and bogs. That's, uh, the double B’s of old frog Folk County Reign (Rachel): Is it going to be your Airbnb that you open up in Gravesford Dart (Ryan): Bugs and Bogs?! Zavari (Samaria): Sounds like a Dave and Busters Bed and Breakfast. Dart (Ryan): Dave and Bugsters… Reign (Rachel): Dart and Bugsters! Dart (Ryan): I was right there. Zavari (Samaria): Gonna open up your own franchise spot Dart (Ryan): Alright. Reign (Rachel): Take over Bullywugs Zavari (Samaria): Just keep fighting. DM (Shanna): Family fighting is family fun. Zavari (Samaria): And now you're closed. Reign (Rachel): And then we turn them into Dart and Bugsters. DM (Shanna): Mhm. I see the vision Reign (Rachel): Capitalism DM (Shanna): More than just a king, Reign (Rachel): Vo would be pissed. Dart (Ryan): The only fight in my restaurant is over who gets the last cicada stuffed tamale? Actually, no. Uh, the delicacy of, uh, Dart and Bugster's will be that giant pill bug thing from Emperor's New Groove. Dart (Ryan): Okay, so are we going to head to Bedegar City to rescue Zola now? DM (Shanna): Um, Tace is like, “hey, do you want to, like, try that circle that you guys made already just to see if..” Dart (Ryan): If we can jump back? DM (Shanna): Might still be there. Reign (Rachel): I thought Dart.. Dart (Ryan): I thought we kicked it apart. DM (Shanna): Did you break it apart? Reign (Rachel): I thought Dart stayed behind and wiped it away. Dart (Ryan): Did we, like, jump? DM (Shanna): I couldn’t.. I didn't remember that. Dart (Ryan): Oh, did we flee back there and then make the jump home? Or did we jump.. Reign (Rachel): We took our horses home. Dart (Ryan): We jumped to the thing and then rode home. Reign (Rachel): Yeah. So we jump to the circle on the edge of town. Dart (Ryan): Then I think we did kick it apart so it couldn't be followed. Reign (Rachel): Mhm. DM (Shanna): Okay. Thanks. Dart (Ryan): We did not think that we were gonna.. We 100% forgot Zola the first time. I think that's on us. DM (Shanna): This instance... Dart (Ryan): This thing's got so complicated, so fast. DM (Shanna): You were so glad to have Saxton in hand. You're like, we're getting the fuck out of here. DM (Shanna): You ride to Bedegar and it rains, like, all day the first day. Zavari (Samaria): Did we get a teleportation scroll? Reign (Rachel): It takes a little bit. And he'll send it to us in the diplomats pouch. DM (Shanna): Yeah, Tace will send it to you. Zavari (Samaria): Okay. I just didn't want it to be all the way there and be like, oh, we have to do this ride again. DM (Shanna): It's like an hour per spell level. It's like level five spell Zavari (Samaria): Okay, Rachel: well, we're going to have to do that because… DM (Shanna): Because of the scribe. It takes half the time. So it's like it's a 2.5 hours. Zavari (Samaria): Oh yeah. Dart (Ryan): It still takes us multiple days to get there. Zavari (Samaria): Yeah. He can send it. Rachel: Okay. Dart (Ryan): On the rainy road to Bedegar. Zavari (Samaria): On the road again. Reign (Rachel): Moving right along. Going straight to Muppets. Dart (Ryan): Yeah. Uneventful ride? DM (Shanna): Um. Roll D12 Reign (Rachel): Nine. Dart (Ryan): That's what I got too! DM (Shanna): Yeah uneventful ride. The group: Woot woot! DM (Shanna): It just rained a lot the first day, which sucked. Reign (Rachel): Mhm. DM (Shanna): You're waterlogged. It sucked for some people Reign (Rachel): the horses. DM (Shanna): Yeah. And the horses and the horses are pissed. Reign (Rachel): Mhm. DM (Shanna): I would say.. they just made this journey and then we're doing this shit again and we're doing double time again. Dart (Ryan): Well I don't have a horse. Pretty sure I had a horse. Reign (Rachel): Sorry friends. Right. DM (Shanna): That’s right, you guys you didn't take Morag this time, right? Reign (Rachel): Oh, She would’ve been so good. Zavari (Samaria): Uh Huh DM (Shanna): So, Is that correct? Zavari (Samaria): She did almost die last time. Reign (Rachel): Keep Morag at home. She needs to protect that place too. We need one more person that we can trust back there. DM (Shanna): Yeah Reign (Rachel): That Reign can trust. Okay. We'll be okay if Morag stays back DM (Shanna): You can't trust Morag to not drink your tea. But you can trust her to not kill your prisoners. Dart (Ryan): That's true. DM (Shanna): Mostly. Morag (Shanna): Not on purpose, anyway. Reign (Rachel): Awesome person ** Zavari (Samaria): That's true. DM (Shanna): Um. But. Yeah. So there's no, uh, spiders this time during the journey. Zavari (Samaria): I'm not gonna faint this time. DM (Shanna): Yeah. Um. And. Yeah, you make it to Bedegar City. Um.. Reign (Rachel): Can you send Daru and see how what it's like if there's anything that's changed if like… Zavari (Samaria): just scout ahead? Reign (Rachel): Yeah Zavari (Samaria): yeah. DM (Shanna): Okay. Um, so you guys, like, hang back a ways and send out Daru? Zavari (Samaria): Mhm. DM (Shanna): Um, and, um, go ahead and roll investigation or perception for the area. And you're like looking through his eyes I assume. Zavari (Samaria): Mhm. I don't know what this modifier is.. and I rolled a ten. DM (Shanna): Okay. Zavari (Samaria): Mhm.. do like an eleven. DM (Shanna): Okay. Um so on the main road coming into town. There are guards where there were not previously guards. Um, there's.. the town itself isn't, like gated, not like the whole town. So, like, really all they can do is kind of patrol the road. Um, there is, like, definitely a larger presence of, like, people patrolling throughout the city. Um, are you just, uh, are there any particular places you're wanting Daru to focus on when he's looking around or.. Zavari (Samaria): um, probably around where the well was that he snuck in through the first time? Does that area look, like, heavily monitored? DM (Shanna): Um, yes. The well now has guards by it. And it has. Dart (Ryan): That was how he snuck into the.. the.. Keep wasn’t it? Zavari (Samaria): yeah DM (Shanna): there's a stone like slab over the.. like covering of the wall. Reign (Rachel): But wasn't there another there was another entry through that.. in that way DM (Shanna): there was another entry, Reign (Rachel): but that probably like DM (Shanna): outside of the, uh, the castle walls, Reign (Rachel): Mhm.. but they probably know about. It's connected to that. Right. DM (Shanna): It's connected to that tunnel. Yeah. Zavari (Samaria): I mean, yeah. Um, is Daru..? Zavari (Samaria): I can focus on the other entrance that we know about. DM (Shanna): Okay, so if Daru flies over to the other entrance that you guys know about, it, like, comes out of some, like, bushes, sort of like it's supposed to be kind of an unassuming. It's like a secret entrance. Um, there is like a massive boulder, like, on it, if that makes sense. Like, like somebody just put a huge boulder on it. Not impossible to move the boulder, but it is a potential obstacle. Zavari (Samaria): I could Eldritch Blast it. Reign (Rachel): It's pretty loud. I don't want to draw that much attention to it. Zavari (Samaria): Is Eldritch Blast loud? I mean, Blast is in the name. DM (Shanna): Yeah. Reign (Rachel): And you're trying to.. I was trying to think leverage wise, we could try to figure it out. Just to roll it. Dart (Ryan): uh. I'm sorry, I, I thought that those were secret entrances to the keep, but we're not going to the keep. Reign (Rachel): No, we're going to the prison. Dart (Ryan): Yeah, DM (Shanna): but the prison is on the other side of the walls, so I think that that was their thinking was like, Dart (Ryan): Oh okay, DM (Shanna): You know. Reign (Rachel):What about the prison? DM (Shanna): Because there was an exit outside, sort of by the barracks. That's the one you guys took and went to the Star Chamber from. And there's like one that's like in the Keep itself. But you guys decided to go back when you guys went into the keep. Dart (Ryan): I mean, walls might be a problem for you guys. I can just walk right over Reign (Rachel): Flux and I can get over pretty easy. Zavari (Samaria): She's just so tired. She's like, I can I can get over to you. DM (Shanna): Um, but but yeah, but like I said, the main road that leads into town is also, like, are in there, you know? And, um, other than that, like, things seem to be kind of like business as usual, if that makes sense. Like, it's not like the city's in chaos or anything like that. Reign (Rachel): Someone else is pulling the strings. There must be someone else in charge like.. DM (Shanna): But yeah, with an eleven I’d say that’s… Zavari (Samaria): Probably where the head of the military is right now. Reign (Rachel): Reign writes Edmond.. Would Edmond know? Dart (Ryan): Probably not. Reign (Rachel):Okay, Tace would know? Zavari (Samaria): I think that if you sent out a letter like.. Reign (Rachel): “Look, I have a wand of beans, guys” DM (Shanna): They are reaching out to Tace? Zavari (Samaria): Yeah. Asking like, do you know who's in charge of the military? DM (Shanna): Um, they'll write back and it'll say, yeah, he does. He does know. Um, yeah. It's a man named Trask. Um, he's like the captain of the guard. Um, that's probably like. Because their.. the thing is that their.. Bedegar did not have a formal, like, military. If that makes sense, before Saxton. Saxton raised that.. the militant force that is, that is there is something that's been raised and got, you know, from the Emperor, presumably. So, um, but the captain of the guard, his name is Trask. Uh, Hillridge. Um, he doesn't know if that's who would be in charge. Um, but he does say that he reached out to, um, The Clock, and he arranged for you guys to meet with somebody in the city who might know more. Zavari (Samaria): Okay DM (Shanna): If you're able to like if you want to go that route of like going into the city and then like instead of like rushing. Um, you don't know currently if like, your identity is known. Uh, because, like, you killed everyone. You guys came into contact with it. Besides Saxton, who you took. Zavari (Samaria): Yeah. And we were invisible. We were very stealthy. DM (Shanna): So, like, they. You don't know if they know, like, you guys or anything like that. Um, but you guys were already wanted, I believe. So, you know, Dart (Ryan): Let's go back to the stables where we met that one guy. Zavari (Samaria): Yeah Dart (Ryan): He saw us, and we didn't kill him. Maybe you can tell us more about what's been going on in the city since we were left there. Zavari (Samaria): I mean, he was really friendly. You, like, gave him, like, a potion or something. Dart (Ryan): I gave him a potion of domination and told him that it would make him super strong. DM (Shanna): Lucky, you told him it would make him lucky. And he's like.. said he was going to take it before he asked a girl out. Dart (Ryan): What could possibly go wrong? DM (Shanna): Since you haven't. Domination is not kicked in. I mean, as far as you know, Zavari (Samaria): Just cancel that date the next day like Mhm. DM (Shanna): Well, the potion of domination like it affects whoever drinks it. Zavari (Samaria): Oh so like DM (Shanna): Dart gave it to him. So like I said that dart would just randomly become aware that he was controlling him.. At some point. But I mean he hasn't drank it yet. Zavari (Samaria): Okay. DM (Shanna): He's nervous. Dart (Ryan): That guy seemed amenable to bribes, so we could probably go talk to him again. Zavari (Samaria): Oh, yeah, I think we should. DM (Shanna): If you could convince him to drink it and then pilot him into the city so that you don't get caught. Dart (Ryan): Ray ray? Reign (Rachel): Yes. Dart (Ryan): We were thinking we should go talk to the guy at the stables that we talked to last time. Reign (Rachel): Mhm. Yeah, I think that’s perfectly.. I'm good. Sorry I've had a little DM (Shanna): I don’t remember his name. Zavari (Samaria): New name. The new. The old name wasn't recorded. DM (Shanna): Yeah. So it didn't exist. Zavari (Samaria): You get to rewrite the canon DM (Shanna): Um. Um. His name is going to be, uh, Rudren.. Pierce. Reign (Rachel): To Rudren! DM (Shanna): Good ole Rudren. Reign (Rachel): Rudy DM (Shanna): Stable master. Rudy (Shanna): “Don't call me Rudy”. Reign (Rachel): Ru.. Rudren? DM (Shanna): Rudren. R-U-D-R-E-N. Reign (Rachel): Ru? Rudren? ..Just Rudrin? Sorry I like to make up nicknames. I like Ru, but if you want me to say Rudren, I'll do it. Rudy (Shanna): “Whatever you want to do, Lady, whatever you want to do.” Reign (Rachel): Hope you missed us. Rudy (Shanna): I surely did. Um, whatever you want this time I'm charging double. Dart (Ryan): Well this time, we just want information. Rudy (Shanna): Hmm. You don’t need to use my attic again? Dart (Ryan): Not yet.. It depends on the information. Rudy (Shanna):Well, what do you want to know? Dart (Ryan): We want to know who's in charge of the defense of the city now. Rudy (Shanna): You mean like the guards? Dart (Ryan): I mean, what happened after we left? Rudy (Shanna): “Um. Oh, well, wait!” DM (Shanna): And he kind of looks at all three of you Kind of, like, alarmed, and his eyes start, like, darting back and forth. He's like “Do you have Saxton?” Dart (Ryan): I can quantifiably say. No, we do not. Reign (Rachel): Saxtons gone? Zavari (Samaria): “What do you mean ‘Do we have Saxton’”? Rudy (Shanna): It was right after you guys left the current Baron.. Saxton.. you guys were immediately like gone right after Reign (Rachel): um, yeah. We're, like confused and.. Rudy (Shanna): “The current Baron Saxon was kidnapped!” Zavari (Samaria): I didn’t hear about it. Reign (Rachel): That’s why we're back. Is because we wanted to, like, go speak to him. Rudy (Shanna): Oh, shit. Well he aint here Zavari (Samaria): That was really recent. Like Rudy (Shanna): they're trying to figure out what happened. There's fucking guards all over the goddamn city, and they increased our taxes again. Goddamn it! Reign (Rachel): What? Zavari (Samaria): Are there any popular theories going around? Rudy (Shanna): Um, I mean, I honestly. I don't talk to that many people. You guys. I don't really know. Reign (Rachel): That's okay. Zavari (Samaria): It's there. ** Rudy (Shanna): I just know that he's missing. They're looking for whoever did it, and there's a Regent. But I don't know who the hell it is. And some guy I've never heard of. Zavari (Samaria): What's the Regents name? Oh, so Rudy (Shanna): I don't remember. Reign (Rachel): Oh, man. Dart (Ryan): Man, taxes are higher, but you sure could use someone to pay you a fair amount of money for use of you're attic again. Rudy (Shanna): Fuck yeah, I could, that's why I started double charging people. If my property taxes went up, so your fees went up. Dart (Ryan): So last time we paid you… a potion? Rudy (Shanna): Yeah, I wanted some money this time. You guys are rich. I can tell, I smelled the gold.. Dart (Ryan): Okay… Rudy (Shanna): 20 platinum! Dart (Ryan): 20 platinum?!?! Zavari (Samaria): Let’s give like a gold piece. Rudy (Shanna): Look, I'm pretty sure you guys are, like, fucking murderers.. Dart (Ryan): That is offensive. Reign (Rachel): We're gonna find someone else’s attic Rudy (Shanna): Go ahead. Be my guest. Or don't be my guest. Reign (Rachel): Ha! Nice. Rudy (Shanna): You can pay it, can't you? Dart (Ryan): Let me guess. You're not going to use that money to pay your taxes. You're going to use that money along with that potion of luck I gave you.To Take out that that girl you like. Then you'll be rich enough to win her favor. Isn't that right? Rudy (Shanna): What does that have to do with anything? Dart (Ryan): I'm just asking. Rudy (Shanna): But yeah, he's totally flustered. He's like, blushing. And he's like, “well um.. It’s really none of your business what I do with the money you pay me. And even if, even if, even if I did do that it still won’t offset the cost of the taxes. Dart (Ryan): I'm just saying DM (Shanna): money is money is. ** Dart (Ryan): Maybe I'd be more inclined to rent your attic and pay you the money you want. If I knew that it was going to give love a chance to blossom. Rudy (Shanna): Oh, well, yeah, that's exactly what I'm going to do. It's exactly what I'm going to do. Reign (Rachel): Whose bookie is behind this? Rudy (Shanna): He’s like kind of sweating. He's like bald, I think I remember saying he was bald, he’s kind of like, sweating, like, he kind of dabs his, like, brow, his head, and he's like. “That girl's really pretty, prettier than you” Zavari (Samaria): I doubt it. Dart (Ryan): Tell you what, I do have something even better than money. Hear me out! I have the magical ability to reduce or enlarge the size of things. Rudy (Shanna): What kind of things? Dart (Ryan): Oh, I think you know exactly what kind of things. Rudy (Shanna): And he says “You got yourself a deal”. All of this silliness. He's like, “you got yourself a deal”. He's like, so fucking serious. Dart (Ryan): All right, I'm going to magically enlarge this guy's penis.. Ham fact it up! Zavari (Samaria): Zevari’s guilty pleasure. She likes really trashy, low brow romance novels DM (Shanna): like Tusk Love. Zavari (Samaria): It will make Tusk Love blush. If you see her with a book. Either it's something magical or if it has a book covering on it, like to hide the cover.. DM (Shanna): 50 Shades of Fey. Zavari (Samaria): Oh God, that's a little too low brow. Even for her. DM (Shanna): They are somewhere in between 50 Shades of Fey and Tusk Love. Zavari (Samaria): Yeah. DM (Shanna): Is… Zavari (Samaria): That's where she calls it. DM (Shanna): That's the spectrum. Perfect. Dart (Ryan): 50 Shades of Fey is very popular in the Frogfolk communities Zavari (Samaria): Very informative. Dart (Ryan): Yeah, we’re a flexible people. DM (Shanna): There's a lot of, like, fey plant women. And, you know, Dart (Ryan): you know, because I don't have bones. Reign (Rachel): What do you have? Dart (Ryan): my body is supported by a system of fluid filled canals Reign (Rachel): Double Ham Fact Today. That's not your guilty pleasure. You're proud of them. DM (Shanna): Proud of them Canals. Dart (Ryan): My guilty pleasure isn't guilty, per se. But as my life has become more, um, consumed with kingly and parental duties, I have become disconnected from my natural roots. And so in order to get back to that, in some small way, I have started collecting smooth rocks Reign (Rachel): Smooth rock-erator Zavari (Samaria): Do you take the time to polish them? Dart (Ryan): No, I just pick ones I really like and I put them in a box. Zavari (Samaria): Ahh DM (Shanna): Nice..nice.. Dart (Ryan): That's a little thing I do just for me. Morag (Shanna) Hey! Those are some really nice rocks you got there. Dart (Ryan): Don't look at them. These are mine! DM (Shanna): Penna’s Guilty pleasure… Reign (Rachel): Oh, snap. DM (Shanna): Um. And Penna is very embarrassed about this. She loves eating onions, like, whole. Like.. like an apple. She just thinks it's. It's just the crunch is just so satisfying and like the layers. And she does not. She has never done this in front of another person. She will, like, sneak off into her room with a whole onion and just eat it. Zavari (Samaria): We should’ve left her in the Underdark Dart (Ryan): I eat bugs. And I think that's gross. DM (Shanna): yeah, everybody's like.. I feel differently about her now. Reign (Rachel): Not even her boyfriend? Or does he do it? Do they like lady and the tramp it? DM (Shanna): He doesn't. No. No, she. This is she. No one knows. Zavari (Samaria): This is like she's alone. Lock the door. DM (Shanna): Daru, like, probably told you about this shit. Zavari (Samaria): Oh my God. DM (Shanna): Daru saw her and she didn't realize. And. Yeah.. Zavari (Samaria): Imagine all the things that Daru and Flux know that the party doesn’t DM (Shanna): You know what else I think Penna likes? Like the feeling of, like, the onion juice making her eyes water. Zavari (Samaria): She's fucking freak. Dart (Ryan): She's got layers. DM (Shanna): Exactly like, it's kind of like, you know, some people that really enjoy, like, spicy shit when it, like, makes them cry. It makes their, like, nose run and stuff. It's like that. Like, it's just such an intense sensory experience. Reign (Rachel): Yeah. You know, whatever I said for Reign, uh, during this Ham Fact situation doesn't matter, because we learned earlier that Reigns guilty pleasure is absolutely, uh, Lord's Xarus. Uh, so, yeah, bye! Ham Fact it down. Ad Break: Characters without stories is tabletop roleplaying game podcast about the roads not yet travelled. Every episode I bring in a friend to tell me about a character they long to play. Characters without stories is about how our characters intersect and reveal our identities, and how play is a gateway to personal growth. The way I see tabletop is that I am running to something, I am running to a world where it's possible for me to feel comfortable enough to stand up for myself. The reason that you can die in these games is because it matters and something mattering is one of most precious things we can have. You want your life and your stories to matter. Roleplay is a fantastic tool for exploring stories, and exploring people. Thank you and may all your characters find their stories! DM (Shanna): How long will it last? DM (Shanna): Make good use of it! Dart (Ryan): That's a very good question. Reign (Rachel): Might be able to. Can we can we try to, like, harness it into, like a pill so that you can have your date without a boner, right? Zavari (Samaria): Well it’s enlarge. Not that. Reign (Rachel): Okay. I'm going to go away now. Please stop thinking about his penis.. and look at these photos of the photos of um… Zavari (Samaria): Photos? Reign (Rachel): Xarus sent me some photos. Zavari (Samaria): Oh! Reign (Rachel): Well there’s not photos, they’re like paintings. Zavari (Samaria): So just let me see. Reign (Rachel): You can see this one.. Dart (Ryan): It's, um… DM (Shanna): It's like. It's a, like, dress with, like, long, flowy hair. With like the moonlight behind them. Reign (Rachel): Long, white, flowy hair. DM (Shanna): Yeah exactly, he's literally beautiful. It's like. Zavari (Samaria): She's like, that's the dress. DM (Shanna): There's, like, cherry blossoms. Yeah. That's fair. Zavari (Samaria): This little dress. Reign (Rachel): They look great in it. Dart (Ryan): It's a concentration spell. DM (Shanna): For how long? Uh, like, how long would you have to concentrate on it? Reign (Rachel): Within range, what’s the range too? Dart (Ryan): I mean Zavari (Samaria): Is this some of your casting on him or like something that you're giving? Dart (Ryan): This is different because it's not just it's it's not the normal magic. It's a wand. Zavarri (Samaria): Oh. So just tell him how to use it. Reign (Rachel): Wand for his wand.. Yeah Dart (Ryan): I got an idea. I will give you some money for a nice date. slash your taxes. Rudy (Shanna): I'm listening. Dart (Ryan): You take the potion of luck I gave you. You go flash some fancy coins at the lady you like and ask her out. And then when you're ready to go on the date, I will, uh. Mhm. Your stuff Rudy (Shanna): “You’re too kind!” He's like taken aback. He's like, “this is such a good deal”. Um.. Zavari (Samaria): he's never seen such generosity before. DM (Shanna): Make a deception check. Reign (Rachel): Is it? DM (Shanna): Or persuasion if it's not deception. Dart (Ryan): I am being completely honest. I will give him the money. I will ‘do the thing’ on the grounds that he goes and asks the girl and the date first. I can't just give him the stuff if he doesn't even know if he's going to get the date. Reign (Rachel): It's true. Dart (Ryan): 17. Rudy (Shanna):“That's amazing. You can use my attic as much as you want”. Dart (Ryan): I thought you might say that, you got yourself a deal. Rudy (Shanna): You got yourself a fucking deal. Reign (Rachel): The bro to bro. DM (Shanna): Yeah. And it's like, literally makes that noise because. DM (Shanna): It's an honor to receive your slime. *BARF* Zavari (Samaria): I have to hold myself Dart (Ryan): I’m going to put ten platinum pieces in his hand. Rudy (Shanna):“Hell yeah”. Dart (Ryan): “All right there, big shooter. Drink your potion and go get your girl.”. Rudy (Shanna): “Bet. Hell Yeah”. DM (Shanna): He runs upstairs. And like if you let few minutes kind of go by and then all of a sudden dart, um, your eyes sort of like roll back in your head for a second and you feel like it feels kind of similar to, like when the aboleth was connected with you, or like when that creature that you that you felt, um, in, uh, the star chamber. Like when you, when you connected with that creature. It's kind of a similar feeling. It's this like feeling of minds, you know, intersecting with each other. The only thing is, is that as soon as, like, your mind touches his, you kind of get, like, a little bit of a vibe from him. Like, you feel this intense nervousness, like this intense, like giddy nervousness, like excitement. But it quickly fades as, like his, his mind completely like, buckles under the pressure of your mind. It's like it's. Zavari (Samaria): It's like opening a door. DM (Shanna): Easy as. Yeah, easy as pie. Like it's just. you're here and you can. And you feel like your influence over this person. Um, let me see. Dominate person. But while the target is stronger, you have the telepathic link with it. As long as the two of you are on the same plane of existence, you can use this telepathic link to issue commands to the creature while you are conscious. No action required, which it does its best to obey. You can specify a simple and general course of action, such as attack that creature, run over there, fetch the object. The creature completes an order and doesn't receive further directions. It defends and preserves itself to the best of its ability. You can use your action to take total and precise control of the target. So until the end of your next turn and, um. And it doesn't do anything you don't allow it to do, so you basically can pilot it. You can pilot him if you're fully concentrating on it. This domination from the potion. Lasts one D4 hours so you can roll a d4. And these are the potions that they were using to kidnap spellcasters. Dart (Ryan): Well, I've got him for four hours. Zavari (Samaria): Hell, yeah. DM (Shanna): So, yeah, this is what they were using to kidnap spellcasters, tricking them into drinking. Dart (Ryan): I have been waiting for this potion of domination for, like, 40 sessions Zavari (Samaria): Playing the long con. Dart (Ryan): My time has come. DM (Shanna): You are suddenly Zavari (Samaria): a guy. DM (Shanna): Rudren. Dart (Ryan): Okay. DM (Shanna): Rudren Pierce, you immediately feel like a little bit itchy in his body? Zavari (Samaria): The bones. The bones are so heavy. Dart (Ryan): Okay, okay, first things first. I'm going to give myself back my ten platinum. Because that is way more money that he needs. That's a crazy amount of money. DM (Shanna): So while dart is fully piloting him, your your eyes are like, rolled back and you're probably just you can probably just, like, sit somewhere, you know what I mean? Kind of like Dart (Ryan): I'm doing the whole, uh, what's the guy's name? The.. from Korra, where he's sitting in the hotel. The truth-sayer dude. DM (Shanna): Yeah Dart (Ryan): Whatever that guy's name was. I'm that dude right now. I'm totally. I'm Zen. DM (Shanna): Exactly. Dart (Ryan): Okay, so what to do with this guy. You know, I sympathize with him. Our actions did cause his taxes to go up. That's pretty brutal, you know? Um, so, um.. DM (Shanna): for the first time, you have a beard to stroke. Dart (Ryan): Yeah, I have an actual beard to stroke instead of my own slimy face. Rachel: You have five fingers. Dart (Ryan): I have five fingers. That's weird. DM (Shanna): What the hell is this extra? Zavari (Samaria): You're non-moist… Oh, it's not sticky! Dart (Ryan): I got no sticky tongue. DM (Shanna): Yeah, that's what you're kind of like, as I imagine you feel kind of itchy because you're not like moist. Zavari (Samaria): You're probably dehydrated, Reign (Rachel): and you can't moisten yourself with your tongue. DM (Shanna): He's got psoriasis. Reign (Rachel): He probably has a.. Oh, yeah. Okay. Dart (Ryan): Yeah. First I'm going to give the ten platinum back to Dart. But then I'm going to take, um, like 25 gold out of Dart’s purse, which is a much more reasonable amount, I think that's that's still like a sizable chunk of change for a guy who just rents horses. Um, then I'm going to do this *peeks down the front of his trousers*.. Check out what I'm working with. Reign (Rachel): Mhm. Dart (Ryan): Mhm. DM (Shanna): You can roll for that if you'd like. Reign (Rachel): Show me what you're working with Dart (Ryan): I'm going to roll a one d8 Because that's like a good DM (Shanna): A range. Yeah. Goldilocks. Dart (Ryan): It's a good range of inches. That's a thing I thought I'd never say.. four, uh.. Reign (Rachel): That's a grower, not a shower. Dart (Ryan): Well, the next thing I'm going to do is Reign (Rachel): Enlarge! Dart (Ryan): I'm going to take the wand of enlarge/reduce out of Darts, uh, belt, and I'm going to enlarge. So we're just going to flip that to an eight.. For the time being. Reign (Rachel): What's happening? Dart (Ryan): Oh, you guys are watching this whole thing go down. DM (Shanna): Well, you see okay, so what you see is you see the guy come down and darts, like, eyes are rolled back. Are you guys like “Dart? Dart?” or, like, how are you guys reacting to this? Reign (Rachel): “Darts freaking out. Especially with this guy” I’m like grabbing.. Dart (Ryan): I'm going to be like “guys, guys, don't worry, it's me. It's Dart code word. Charlene” Zavari (Samaria): You're a human! Reign (Rachel): Hoooowww? Dart (Ryan): Magic, Obviously. Look at my face. Zavari (Samaria): Which one? Dart (Ryan): My frog face. Reign (Rachel): It's it's focusing now. Just frog focus. Dart (Ryan): I'm going to send this guy out for a nice time. He'll be happy. It's all going to work out. Have some faith in me. I got this guy for four hours, don’t worry, just chill out here for a second. I'm going to do some things in his body. Just stay right here, okay? DM (Shanna): Make an Arcana check. Zavari (Samaria): 13. Reign (Rachel): Uh, 17. DM (Shanna): Um, Zarvari, I feel like you recognize this, but the recognition makes you panic and Reign. You're like, oh, shit, this is domination. Like, you know, like it comes to you. Like you realize exactly what it is. Zavari is like is too panicky to even think. Like, she just started panicking a little bit and she can't think, Zavari (Samaria): I have to get out of here. I'll just stay outside. I'll wait outside. I'll just be some guy. Dart (Ryan): I've got a plan. Zavari (Samaria): What is your plan? Reign (Rachel): I’m gonna hold your hand Zavari (Samaria): She’s like avoiding eye contact. Dart (Ryan): Well, first of all, this guy already lives here, so no one's going to question him walking around town. So the first thing I'm going to do is bribe one of the prison guards for a set of keys. Then I'm going to return those keys here to us, and then I'm going to send this guy off to the inn, hook him up with a fine lady, and then once that's all going down, I'm going to release control of this dude. We can be on our merry way. He'll be happy. We'll be happy. Everybody's happy. Reign (Rachel): All right, well, you do that. Let's go do something else. Zavari (Samaria): She has her like… Reign (Rachel): Well, we can't. We have to watch your body. Or should we like.. Dart (Ryan): I mean, I assume he's not expecting visitors, but maybe, uh, put me in the attic for now? I don't know Reign (Rachel): Attic for protection? Yeah. God I’m scared. DM (Shanna): What do you guys want to do? Tace also said that he was trying to arrange a meeting with a member of the clock. So if, uh, if you guys are interested in that. Reign (Rachel): Oh. In Bedegar? DM (Shanna): Yeah. When you guys had asked, like, who's running the military, it was like I was talking to, um, not Eula. Uh, who was the other guy? Spendthrift. And, um. Yeah, he was talking to spendthrift. And they have like, some people, you know, on the inside still of Bedegar. And so somebody can meet with you briefly to kind of, like, give you some information. Reign (Rachel): I think if you wanted to. I think that would be great if we could do that. But if to get out onto the streets, if you wanted to change into someone else, could you change the, I can do invisibility, right? I think, yeah, I can go invisible or emo-reign can reappear. Dart (Ryan): I got this guy, he's got a pocketful of gold and a pocketful of Mhm. I can accomplish anything. Reign (Rachel): You go do your things and we'll go do our things. DM (Shanna): And so we're going to put Darts body in the attic? Dart (Ryan): I mean, really like I can put my own body in the attic. Reign (Rachel): Yeah. Go put your own body where you feel it's most safe in a closet. Dart (Ryan): This is the most brilliant plan I've ever had in the history of D&D, Reign (Rachel): Playing the long game. Dart (Ryan): 50 sessions in the making. And now I've got a walking human porn star that I can do anything with. DM (Shanna): Reign is invisible. Zavari..? Zavari (Samaria): The most nondescript, bland man you've ever seen. DM (Shanna): Roll for nonchalance. Dart (Ryan): You're my wingman. Zavari (Samaria): 15 DM (Shanna): You're pretty nonchalant. Pretty unassuming. Zavari (Samaria): Still has the eye bags. That doesn't go away with it. DM (Shanna): Yeah. The state of you still stays with you. Dart (Ryan): Ive got all of Darts charisma, but none of his frog-like qualities. DM (Shanna): Yeah, you're like, wow, this body so inefficient, Zavari (Samaria): so dry. DM (Shanna): Yeah, but he's like a kind of, like a big dude. So he's probably, like, six foot. So do you like huge. Dart (Ryan): Awesome. DM (Shanna): So you guys walk into the city because the stables are kind of like on the outskirts of town, but it's not like far from the outskirts of town. It's just like, you know, and you're heading like towards, like the castle, like walls, because the prison is like behind the castle walls. And then inside that wall was the barracks, the star chamber, the prison. And then in the middle was the castle. The prison was on like the left side, the star chamber and the barracks was on the right side. And there was also like a stables. So, um, you still need to get like if you're going straight to the prison itself, you still need to get like through the gates in some way. And right now, you know, they're not letting, like, random citizens in and out. It's up to you guys how you want to try to approach that situation. Reign (Rachel): Um.. Zavari (Samaria): Do we maybe want to change course and try to do.. Will you only have this guy's body for four hours? Dart (Ryan): Is there a, uh. Reign (Rachel): We might have his body, but we don't have his mind. So even if we are able to find someone he knows that we're able to get a guard to take him seriously. Is that your goal? Is to find a guard, to go find him? Dart (Ryan): Well, I was going to try and bribe somebody. Seemed easier to do. Not in my body. Reign (Rachel): But who is the person to bribe? Dart (Ryan): Yeah, I guess I kind of thought that the prison was more accessible. DM (Shanna): You could try bribing the gate guards. Reign (Rachel): You could cause a ruckus and get thrown into prison. DM (Shanna): Well, at least one thing's for sure. You can completely explore the city without anybody thinking that you're a wanted criminal. So you've got that going for you. Which is pretty nice, I would say. Dart (Ryan): Okay. Zavari (Samaria): Maybe we can set up a time with a Clock contact. They can help us at least have some more information. Maybe an alternative way to get in? Reign (Rachel): Mhm Yes. DM (Shanna): I was so wrong. It's not. Um. Spendthrift, its Willoughby Twobuckle. Spendthrift was the guy, the landlord. Zavari (Samaria): Boo! Reign (Rachel): Willoughby Twobuckle? DM (Shanna): Yeah. It was Willoughby Twobuckle. Um, so what are you guys going to do? I mean, you guys are walking around. I mean, it's like business as usual. There's people around. Um, I mean, it's day, day time when you guys arrived. So, you know, there's people kind of going about their days. Um, some taverns aren't open yet, but the ones that, like, serve food are, um, there are plenty of, like, guards around as well. Um, you know, Zavari (Samaria): I’ll send Tace a message that we would like to meet with the clock contact. DM (Shanna): Okay. Um, so, uh, Tace will say. Yeah. Um, you can meet their contact. Karina. She is in an inn. Um, it's called the White Wolf inn. But the sign is faded, so the locals call it the Faded Wolf. And she's. She should be waiting in her room for you in about 15 minutes because she's in the area. Zavari (Samaria): Okay. DM (Shanna): And it is room C, you know, uh, Zavari (Samaria): Gonna communicate that with the rest of the team DM (Shanna): Um knock three times and then drag a nail across the door twice. *Knock, knock knock, scratch scratch* Reign (Rachel): Wow are your nails? I feel like your nails are probably better than mine, Zavari (Samaria): you can tell she's bitten them all down to nubs. Reign (Rachel): Oh. Like how.. Dart (Ryan): Ooo fingernails! Zavari (Samaria): Oh, yeah. Like, what the hell are these things? Reign (Rachel): Dart is going to do that. DM (Shanna): Yeah. Yeah. You. His fingernails are because of, like, the work he does. I feel like his fingernails are really thick and tough, you know? And his hands are probably very rough, but strong. Dart (Ryan): Sweet. DM (Shanna): Yeah, the dude probably he’s probably pretty strong. Um, but yeah, if you guys want to do that Zavari (Samaria): Let’s make our way over DM (Shanna): It's easy for you guys to find the faded wolf. Um, the sign is really big. Kind of canvas it. And it is a cozy little inn it has, uh, two stories, and it has, like, a balcony off the back. Reign (Rachel): Um, what's the balcony over? DM (Shanna): Um, just like a field, but like the field behind the the town square. Sort of like there's nothing. It's nothing like that. That makes sense. It's kind of like there's, like stairs that lead, like, up to the balcony around the back. So it's kind of like you can access some of the rooms from that. You know, you don't have to go in the front door to access some of the rooms. You could go up and like around. There's like a big like shared balcony that some of the rooms lead out to the front door. Um, yeah. There's somebody, you know, behind the front counter and they're like, “hey, well met, stayed out of the rain yesterday? Dart (Ryan): You know, I did. I'm feeling.. Barkeep (Shanna): great. Dart (Ryan): Very confident. Barkeep (Shanna): Great. Um, how can I help you? Or just here for drinks? Do you need a room? Dart (Ryan): I could use a drink. It's been a long day of stable keeping. Barkeep (Shanna): Oh, wow. Yeah. You guys have to get up really early, don't you? Dart (Ryan): You have no idea. Barkeep (Shanna): And he'll kind of, like, reach, you know, behind the bar and pour an ale. “Um, hope this is okay. We don't serve liquor until 5pm.” Dart (Ryan): As a human man. Ale is my most favorite of drinks. Glug glug glug glug glug glug glug. DM (Shanna): Hello, fellow human. Dart (Ryan): I chug the entire thing, pouring it all over myself DM (Shanna): so the beard, like, soaks up a ton of it. Dart (Ryan): Ooh, this is delicious. Barkeep (Shanna): I'm glad you enjoyed it. I'm glad you enjoyed it. It’s Our own little home brew, if you will. Dart (Ryan): You know what? I think I'll start a tab. Barkeep (Shanna): Ah. Excellent, excellent. What's your name, sir? Reign (Rachel): Barnaby Jones. DM (Shanna): Rudren is the guy's name. Dart (Ryan): That's right. Start a tab, If my name isn't Rudren the stable master. DM (Shanna): Pierce. Rudren Pierce. Barkeep (Shanna): Perfect. Perfect, you already have a tab! Dart (Ryan): Oh, well, then might as well throw some extra on it.. A round for everyone in the tavern, says I! Barkeep (Shanna): “Very well. Yeah. You aren't over the limit”. He just writes down, and, uh, “everyone in the tavern?” Dart (Ryan): Everyone in the tavern. DM (Shanna): All right, well, everybody's like, there's like, there's 10 or 10 or so people, like, in the actual tavern part, you know, having lunch or whatever. And, um, it's not too bad, but yeah, they all come up to the bar and line up for their mug of ale. That's for damn sure. Dart (Ryan): That's called a distraction. Zavari (Samaria): Oh, yeah. Sneak away and let’s find room C DM (Shanna): A nondescript man and an…’ Zavari (Samaria): air… DM (Shanna): And a Miss-appear. Reign (Rachel): And probably the only person sitting. Or would they, like, get up with everyone else? Probably. DM (Shanna): Uh, they said they're going to be in the room. Dart (Ryan): I want to stand up on a table and sing a song while I drink. DM (Shanna): Go ahead. Dart (Ryan): Does anyone remember the song that the hobbits sing when they're in the inn in Bree. Yeah, that's that's my song. DM (Shanna): Roll performance. Reign (Rachel): With the banjo! Zavari (Samaria): Is the Banjo man-sized or frog-sized? Dart (Ryan): Dirty 20! DM (Shanna): Oh, yeah. Everyone’s really into it. Everyone is super fucking into it. And are you guys going to go find the room? Reign (Rachel) and Zevari (Samaria): Yeah. DM (Shanna): All right, so the room is upstairs, and I mean, they're labeled in order, so it's like room. So like room it's room A, B and then C, so C's like at the end of the hall. And then there's like a room D that's, you know, facing the other way. So Reign (Rachel): you do the knock.. Zavari (Samaria): I’ll approach room C and do my DM (Shanna): the door opens just like a tiny bit. Karina (Shanna): Come in Zavari (Samaria): okay. DM (Shanna): And she like opens it only enough to like let you in because she doesn't see Reign. Zavari (Samaria): Um. Uh, um. Reign (Rachel): Excuse me, I'm here too. We're kind of a package deal. I'm sorry. Karina (Shanna): I didn't know you were there. Reign (Rachel): I should have knocked too. Do I need to do it? Karina (Shanna): “No, you don't need to knock..” And then she's going to, like, go. Um. So you're going to, like, walk over to, like, the, uh, bookshelf, and she, like, rubs her hand on the top and collects some, like, dust and goes. And she's like, “ah, now I can see you a little”. Reign (Rachel): Did you just Sprinkle dust.. Sprinkle dust on me? Karina (Shanna): I couldn't think of anything else. Reign (Rachel): Why why, why? Karina (Shanna): What, are you allergic? Reign (Rachel): No, but now I need to sneeze. Karina (Shanna):Oh, well, I was just being clever, I thought. Reign (Rachel): I guess, um, and you are? Karina (Shanna): Karina! And you? I thought there'd be, like, a frog and a lady. Zavari (Samaria): “Um. I’m the lady. Uh, one second” And Zavari, like, you know, goes back to her actual form. DM (Shanna): You Prestidigitation Reign? Zavari (Samaria): Do you want prestidigitation? Reign (Rachel): I want her to have, like, a cute like... Pew pew pew! She does like a little sneeze and it, like, poofs out. And I, um, gets it, like, off. And she's like. Karina (Shanna): “I'm so stupid”. She goes over to the bed and, like, pulls off the sheet and drapes it around her shoulders and is like, “ah, there you are!” Reign (Rachel): “Uh, Hi!” oh, yeah, cause I'm invisible. DM (Shanna) and Zavari (Samaria): Yeah Reign (Rachel): Um. Well I was like, wait a minute. DM (Shanna): That's why she sprinkled dust on you. Reign (Rachel): I'm tracking now. Zavari (Samaria): Yeah. Karina (Shanna): She was like, “I don't” ..she's like “wait, there's…” She's like, she's a part of The Clock. She knows. She immediately was like ‘well, this is an invisible person’. But she was like, “I want to see you”. Reign (Rachel): Um, I figured I'd be invisible for a little bit longer, but, like, I'll like, I don't know. DM (Shanna): I didn’t know, if you wanted to, like, drop the invisibility yet. Reign (Rachel): I don't want to. Because if we go back outside. DM (Shanna): Yeah. I mean, No need, she draped a sheet over your shoulders. And now she’s… Reign (Rachel): Can I… and I'm going to do it and, like, put little eyeholes and a mouth and do like.. do like a stereotypical ghost. You know, like.. Zavari (Samaria): You could paint a mask! Reign (Rachel): Oh, I could With your magic paints Reign (Rachel): But while we're talking, she's painting a little mask to, like, be a creepy Reign. Karina (Shanna): Well, um, I'm Karina. Zavari (Samaria): Hold on. DM (Shanna): Um, she has she's kind of like a thin. She's a thin woman. She looks to be, um, probably, like, in her late 20s. She's a human, um, dark hair, sort of like sunken eyes. And she just looks a little, like, twitchy and nervous, you know, Zavari (Samaria): Girl same Karina (Shanna): um. And she's like, you're, uh, “you're the ones that are gonna turn things around for us, right?” Zavari (Samaria): Hopefully Karina (Shanna): That's what I was told. Anyway, it's it's been rough around here. It's been rough around here, I'll tell you that much. Zavari (Samaria): What's been going on, huh? Karina (Shanna): Well, um, since Saxon was kidnapped, the treasurer took over as the regent. And he has, like, tripled taxes and tripled security. And he is arresting all members of The Clock that they see on sight. And they'll probably he's probably planning on executing all of them. As a matter of fact, um, Zola's execution was supposed to be in a few weeks, but it's been moved up to tomorrow. The treasurer's name is Vernon Nance. Um, so, yeah, he's rushing to execute prisoners as a show of force. Um, and he also has, like, appointed, like an investigative team to try to figure out where Lord Saxton is. He's being like, he's employing very aggressive strategies. So all of us are in hiding as much as possible. But I do know, like I said, that, um, they're planning on executing her tomorrow, and, um, they will be doing it. It should be about, um. Hmm. Um, probably a little bit before noon tomorrow. They'll escort her to the city's public plaza, where they have the gallows. Reign (Rachel): We should go Destroy the gallows. DM (Shanna): Um Zavari (Samaria): after we get her out. Reign (Rachel): Yeah. DM (Shanna): So. Zavari (Samaria): Do you know a way to get to the prison? Karina (Shanna): That's going to be tough right now. I think it's possible, but I know that there was a secret entrance into, like, into the castle grounds that is now closed off. Um, I mean, she'll be heavily guarded at the execution, but I thought that that might be a possible time where she could be recovered. Zavari (Samaria): Maybe try to break into the prison itself. Karina (Shanna): I'm sure if any of us, the members of The Clock get anywhere near this execution, will probably be killed on sight. So, I mean, it's something that, like I've thought about, but it's not something that I think I can do because I'll definitely be recognized. But that was kind of my my best guess. Um, but, I mean, I don't think a prison break would be a bad idea. I mean, you could also, like, disguise yourselves as guards or something, maybe. Or priests. They always have priests going in and out. Zavari (Samaria):I have my disguise.. And I have my Mask of Many faces. I could disguise myself as a priest.. but Dart is still a guy. I'm proficient in disguise Kits. I could probably.. Karina (Shanna): Actually, um, because she's going to be, um, executed tomorrow. Um, it's actually permissible for priests of Saint Verona, um, to, uh, minister those sentenced to death, right? Because, you know, you need to pray for them and whatnot. So that could be an angle to get in Dart (Ryan): I’m not here. Karina (Shanna): But, um. Yeah, I mean, I can answer any any other questions you might have as much as possible, but I do think, you know, if you wanted to go, I think either route is, you know, a possibility. From what I've heard, you guys are really strong. So I'm sure if anyone can manage, it's probably you guys. From what I've heard, your feats have definitely not gone unnoticed by The Clock. The Clock is ticking, but it's also listening. Reign (Rachel): So the treasurer took over? Er like, yeah, Zavari (Samaria): yeah. Karina (Shanna): The treasurer. Um, Nance was, um, a man appointed by Lord Saxton. Reign (Rachel): Do you know who has Lord Saxton? Karina (Shanna): Is that a trick question? Zavari (Samaria): They know Reign (Rachel): Oh, I just.. I didn’t know. Karina (Shanna): Oh, yeah. The clock is always listening. Zavari (Samaria): Does everybody else know who has Saxton, or do they have any idea? Karina (Shanna): They have no idea. Zavari (Samaria): Perfect Karina (Shanna): They have no idea. They have some guesses. I mean, there's been some doubts on that Edmond is alive, but there hasn't been, like, full confirmation, at least as far as, like, you know, anybody in charge is concerned. So they're not even 100% sure of like, what the angle is. Their biggest thought was that it was Kenway’s men because, um, Bedegar was getting ready to attack, uh, Dalrath which, if you guys, you may not remember, but when you guys were, uh, in the star chamber, the the creature had told you that that like, they that they were planning on attacking Dolrath because the emperor was unhappy with Lord Kenway, so he’d given them the Okay, so Saxton wanted to, was going to try to take over Dolrath as well. Zavari (Samaria): I feel like I just had a light bulb moment. Reign (Rachel): Lay it on me Zavari (Samaria): I mean, so Saxton wants to go War.. get rid of the Kenways. Reign (Rachel): Mhm Zavari (Samaria): It's Zavari’s backstory. She’s just.. Reign (Rachel): Mhm.. I… Reigns just like.. Zavari (Samaria): I feel like if you, you see, like, the light flicker in Zavari's head, like hearing it again Reign (Rachel): I was suspicious. I don't want to say anything. But the man that attacked you, we killed him, I killed him, and they Zavari (Samaria): Saxton sent him. Reign (Rachel): It seemed like they were sent. Zavari (Samaria): When we get home, I will be talking to Saxton. I'm not asking permission. Reign (Rachel): Yeah. Of course. DM (Shanna): Um, but, yeah, the monk was, uh, fighting with Lord Peloton.. or what? Sorry, Sir Peloton? Sorry. So.. who was working for Lord Saxton? So, you know, Karina (Shanna): “Where is your, uh, other friend? I thought he planned to talk to us, too.” Reign (Rachel): He does, but he's off doing Dart things. Karina (Shanna): Oh, okay. Um, then we get over there, you're singing and everybody's cheering. Zavari (Samaria): Great diversion. DM (Shanna): There's a lady making twinkly eyes at Rudren. Dart (Ryan): I'm definitely buying another round Flirtatious Bar Patron (Shanna): I’ve never seen you in here before Dart (Ryan): Uh, well, it just so happens I recently came into some special gifts. Flirtatious Bar Patron (Shanna): “Oh, really?” And she, like, reaches out and touches your arm and kind of like, does this this thing… “Oh. Tell me. Tell me about it. Tell me about it. Did you. Did you, like, get an inheritance? Something?” Zavari (Samaria): Inheritance.. DM (Shanna): This is like a, you know. Well, I mean, she's like, uh, she's like a mid 20s woman who has, like, long auburn hair, and she's pretty pretty much just like a nondescript, regular looking person and like, you know, in a dress. Dart (Ryan): I think of the, uh, d&d episode of community where he's just, like “I seduce her” and Abed’s like “How?” and he’s like “Fuck…” Okay. Uh. Flirtatious Bar Patron (Shanna): So, yeah. Did you get, like, an inheritance or something? Dart (Ryan): Uh, you could say that. You could say that I sort of got what everybody wants. Flirtatious Bar Patron (Shanna): “I bet that you.. I bet you do”. And you like giggles and kind of, like, pushes you jokingly, like, on your collar, sort of, you know, I guess would be like your chest cause you're like a tall guy, but, uh, “you're so funny”. Dart (Ryan): Okay. Good lord, this is going so well. Let's get a room. Flirtatious Bar Patron (Shanna): “A room?!? Wow.. slow down handsome. You haven’t asked me my name yet..” Dart (Ryan): Yeah, this is gonna be the dumbest thing I've ever said in my life. But.. “where we're going.. we don't need names.” Flirtatious Bar Patron (Shanna): “Oh. Oh, goodness”. Um. Uh, Reign (Rachel): sometimes a BDSM podcast.. DM (Shanna): um, roll for flirting..? Zavari (Samaria): D&D: a reason to flirt with your friends Dart (Ryan): 27 Flirtatious Bar Patron (Shanna): “Call me whatever you want. What can I call you?” She like whispers Dart (Ryan): just because it's going to mess with them once I let go, “Call me Rudy” Reign (Rachel): Rudy! Flirtatious Bar Patron (Shanna): “Okay, okay, I'll call you Rudy for now, I might call you something else later.” Dart (Ryan): Okay, All right. I want.. Flirtatious Bar Patron (Shanna): “Are you to buy me another drink, Rudy?” Dart (Ryan): “You better believe it.” I'm living vicariously through Rudy. This is my human experience. DM (Shanna): Oh my God. Are you just gonna, like, also eat like, a bunch of, like, food? You know, bunch of, like, burgers and fries? Dart (Ryan): Yeah. I'm I'm I'm big spending tonight, for sure. DM (Shanna): You just ruin this body. Eating a hotdog. Smoking several cigars. Drinking liquor all at the same time. Dart (Ryan): Three in the afternoon. Zavari (Samaria): This is just an evening at the church. Not a panic at the disco. DM (Shanna): It was right there, though. Zavari (Samaria): It was. It was good. Flirtatious Bar Patron (Shanna): Um. But, yeah, I mean, yeah, She’s like “Okay. Yeah. Thanks, What’s up? like. Alright. Like, you're so, you're so confident, you're so confident. I respect that.. Especially, like for a bald man. We'll say to the listeners at home, bald is beautiful. This lady is just kind of a bitch. Dart (Ryan): And Rudy will say that he's got growth where it counts. Reign (Rachel): PUUURRR Flirtatious Bar Patron (Shanna): Um. She's like “you better.. You better be able to Back that up, Rudy.” Dart (Ryan): You better be able to back that up! Zavari (Samaria): This is where the real story is fucking happening. This is one of Zavari’s fucking trashy novels Flirtatious Bar Patron (Shanna): I’ll back it ALL THE WAY UP DM (Shanna): And then she chugs her ale. Zavari (Samaria): A great session, guys. Flirtatious Bar Patron (Shanna): “This is so exciting. I haven't hooked up with a guy in a while. “ Dart (Ryan): I want to cede control of Rudy back to himself… Zavari (Samaria): Dart is unhinged Dart (Ryan): …I will leave it to the listener’s imagination. Dart (Ryan): Suffice it to say, my hope is that Rudy will be very pleased. DM (Shanna): Suddenly he’s like “oh man, why is she calling me Rudy?” Reign (Rachel): Rudy like that booty! DM (Shanna): Rudy and this woman, who we did not learn her name. Zavari (Samaria): Don’t need it! Dart (Ryan): Rudy served his purpose. And I don't think he's going to be disappointed. Except for the small lapse in memory and spent gold Reign (Rachel): and some tum tum issues later. Zavari (Samaria): Oh, yeah. DM (Shanna): New found popularity. Zavari (Samaria): Nasty hangover, DM (Shanna): *I’ve been a Nasty*.. Ope.. I forgot again, I can't vocal stem songs. Um, yeah. So that happens. Zavari (Samaria): Shanna has romanced everyone at the table, DM (Shanna): apparently. Yeah. Zavari (Samaria): Well, congratulations, Reign (Rachel): We need to get you more… DM (Shanna): Just one step closer to that EGOT.. Or Whatever. Zavari (Samaria): Whatever it's called. DM (Shanna): How does Dart feel when he jumps back into himself? Dart (Ryan): I’ve got to Taylor Swift that shit, and shake it off. DM (Shanna): So I guess when you guys come down Rudys’ like gone. Zavari (Samaria): Where’s Dart? Reign (Rachel): Um, maybe we should go to his body. Zavari (Samaria): Okay. Oh, Gosh. She's just like, what the fuck? Reign (Rachel): Hey, bartender. Another round on Rudy's tab Barkeep (Shanna): “He’s been buyin’ them all night. Why not?” marks it down Bar Patrons (Shanna): Rudy! Dart (Ryan): That's what I'm shooting for. Bar Patrons (Shanna): Let's go Rudy. DM (Shanna): Yes. Reign (Rachel): Get that booty! Clap. Clap. Clap clap clap. Zavari (Samaria): That’s what we call a Thunderclap. DM (Shanna): Hell, yeah. Rachel: Thank you for listening. To roll forth. This has been the Empire initiative featuring Samaria Hawkins as Lady Zavari / Lady Litria. Dart (Ryan) Musgrove as King Dart of the Hopkins, Rachel Voss as Reign VosGrove, and our wonderful MD Shanna Cantu. Make sure to follow us on the socials at roll fourth pod. We're big fans of human generated art in every medium, so if you're inspired by moments in our podcast, we want to see it all. Like literally all of it. We want it, we want it, we want it. So tag us so we don't miss your great work. And also make sure to drink some water today and stay safe friends. DM (Shanna): So yeah, when we return you will make your final plans to, you know, rescue Zola. Reign (Rachel): We’re coming Zola! Zavari (Samaria): Sorry we forgot about your girl, our bad Reign (Rachel): It just to show them we can do it twice. And them.. them not even knowing it's us.