- What's wrong? - she asks.
- Well, I've never done it - I reply simply.
She strokes my face.
- I know. But don't worry, it will be fine anyway.
I no longer think about anything. She closes her eyes and her fever slowly increases, at a certain point she calls me love but never pronounces my name, I don't even understand if she realizes she is with me, then suddenly she whispers in my ear I want you and it's like an electric shock in the spine. The time has come. I have a moment of panic, then I spread my arms and let myself fall into the void.
A flash of heat suddenly pushes me up, I see her down there on the edge of an incomprehensible terror, I no longer think of myself and I couldn't either because I'm gone, I have disappeared in her, I'm her, I know exactly what is happening to her, I know where to take her and how, a vortex sucks me in, I retrace my whole life and the scream of the light and nine months of sweet nothingness, she can't get out of that apnea of madness she stays clinging to me she says help me, the whirlpool swallows her while I get up, I lift myself off the ground, my sturdy wings carry me higher and higher, I see the abbey bell tower below me and I don't want to let her sink, I have to carry her with me, then finally the take-off, the flight, the vertigo, the tremendous beauty of her face. I count all the stars of the night as I land softly and give her what's left of myself.
She opens her eyes full of tears: you are very good she whispers. But I'm not very good, I'm nothing. I want to see her like this another hundred, another thousand times. I'm sixteen, I can afford to start over right away.
When we look at the clock it is nearly three in the morning; I suddenly remember my mother, everything seems unreal to me.
Around half past three she leaves me in front of the gate of my house. Anxiety began to eat me up and it doesn't stop until she asks me a question I've been waiting for an hour:
- Is it okay with you if we see each other again?
I don't know what I tell her, but it must be very funny, because she bursts out laughing.