[Click] Is this…Oh, it is! Wow, sorry listeners, we’re having a bit of…technical difficulties, blah blah blah, because SOMEONE hasn’t bothered to fix it. And if you’ve been listening to the broadcast, you all will know it’s a certain someone who’s name starts with a c…nit cypress, shit, we both have c for the starts of our names…you all get it. Cleo. I’m blaming it on Cleo, y’all. Write more mail and tell him to fix the damned buttons, cause it is soooo annoying, and you all have to listen to me clicking and clattering about, and taking up our very precious run time. And I know all of you just could bare to live without us, specifically, me. But that all is besides the point. Let me get to the intro! [Clears throat] Hello, fellow Plants! This is Cypress Floe on Tarda Mors with your bi-Weekly new reports on what’s going on in this here sector, along with some hot goss from the others. Jumping straight into it, we have heard wind that spores from the Fungi have been drifting into the flowers! This has caused major problems for growth, quality of life, and more and more fungi have been sprouting up in sidewalks, homes, sanctuaries, and more. When addressed, one of the interviewed mushrooms had this to say: [Click] [Clears throat] Well, as they said, quote ‘It’s the walls. We did nothing wrong, but the dividers are breaking.’ And that seems to be true! Our dear reporter, CeeCee, when asked, did say that the barriers had been breaking down for years before moving to this sector. Holes, cracks, all sorts of things that’s been gradually breaking it apart, especially due to the consuming nature of the Fungi’s who live there. She mentioned seeing graffiti and scratches when living near one of the outer walls, and spores seemed thick in the air, trying to escape through the holes to spread out more. This has caused the before mentioned problems, even even Cece was a just a young sap. Or whatever the fungus equivalent is for her. The issue seems to have been coming for a long time, insidious as they always are. We hope that the barriers can be all fixed up, but we think it will be sometime before anyone does anything, as not many are quick to jump to the aid of Fungi, as we know. Next up, a pre recorded ad for Juka’s Weeds. thankfully, since it gives me a chance to refill on coffee! Click marijuana? marijuana! A quick way to mellow yourself out. It may feel a bit weird to get high on a plant, being one yourself, but it’s alright. Picked straight from my arms, it’s the freshet hit you’ll ever have. Bad day? Come on down and get some of Juka’s weeds! marijuana? marijuana! A quick way to mellow yourself out. It may feel a bit weird to get high on a plant, being one yourself, but it’s alright. Picke- [Click] Alright, I’m back. What do we have next…oh! We have fan mail! It’s that special time when we read all your mail! let’s get reading! This one is from Jade, reading as follows ‘Hey, sorry if my writing is sub par, I haven’t been feeling well. I know you probably won’t see this, but I just wanted to say thank you for being one of my favourite stations. Im a plant Like you, and I’ve always been a bit concous about that, since most of my friends and peers are flowers, but you’ve made me feel better. Love you!’ Awh, that’s sweet. We all appreciate you tuning in, and I’m really glad you’re accepting yourself. I know there’s a lot of stigma around the different types of Planturms, but never be afraid of being yourself. Next letter is from sunny! ‘Dear cypress, I caused my parents to have relationship issues, I told my mum my dad was cheating, but they’d be happy if I didn’t say anything. It turns out my dad is gay, and was hooking up with both my moms brothers.’ Oh my god. Sunny, please keep updating us, taht is insane. Oh, also, tell your mum she’s got to start playing offence. Your dads ahead by two. Okay, and that will end off our broadcast for today. I’m sorry it’s a tad short, but if you couldn’t tell, there’s been some technical difficulties. Tune in next time!